Page 67 of Torrid Little Passion

Mya

I'mthankful I'm facing away from him as I force the words I've never told anyone else from my lips. I keep my voice even, attempting to sound unaffected by my situation, but I stumble a few times.

First, when I tell him I thought I might be pregnant with Brian's child. I trip over Brian's name, the pain of the moment I realized I'd missed my period slapping me in the face all over again. Followed by the pain I felt when he broke up with me.

Then, when I repeat the words the doctor said to me when my test came back negative.

And finally, when I tell him my prognosis.

He lets me speak, never once interrupting. His hold tightens when I feel my strength slipping, a silent plea for me to continue. So I do. And when it is all over, I let out a long sigh, my heart aching for my loss. Even though I'm not ready to have kids, to start a family, knowing I'll never be able to, not naturally, hurts.

Brady remains quiet, his arms still wrapped around me, letting my revelation sink in.

I realize not being able to conceive or carry a child is not as life-altering as dying, coming back to life, and having to deal with his fears on a daily basis. For me, it feels like I've died a little, though. Growing up I always wanted a big family. I have a huge family, and we're all close. We spend every holiday together. But, as someone who grew up an only child, I promised myself I'd never do that to my kid. I'd at least have two, but I wanted four. Two girls, two boys if I had my way.

So they'd always have someone to play with. Someone to confide in. To cause trouble with. To be grounded with. I wanted my kids to have at least one person who they knew always had their back. A friend and a sibling. A bond that couldn't be broken over an argument.

And now I know I'll never have that.

"Do you want kids, dove?" Brady finally asks.

"Someday. And I will have them, just not the way I always thought. They won't have my eyes or my husband’s nose. I won't see myself in them as they grow up. The possibility of having a daughter who looks like me disappeared six months ago. There's nothing I can do about it, and I get that, but it still sucks."

Tears sting the corners of my eyes, threatening to fall. I managed to keep them at bay while I spoke, disassociating myself with the story. Sharing only facts and not my feelings. And with one stupid question, Brady's opened the flood gates.

He doesn't say anything else as he turns me in his arms and captures my lips. Walking me backward toward the bed, Brady slowly strips me of the little bit of clothing that I'm wearing before removing every stitch of his, leaving him standing bare in front of me. The lights of my room highlight his cheekbones. The curve of his jaw. The colors of the tattoos that cover both of his arms.

I reach for him, and he takes a step back, shaking his head at me.

"If you touch me, this will be over before it begins." A slow smirk begins to spread across his face as he takes his cock in his hand and begins stroking. My eyes lock on the purple head as precum begins to leak from the tip. "I still don't have a condom, dove. Please tell me you have one."

I don't. I've never brought anyone back to my room, not even Brian. We always went to his place. He made sure he had a supply, the same way Brady always had them. Hidden in a drawer close to the bed for easy access.

When I shake my head, Brady advances toward me again, raising his free hand and pressing it flat against my chest, over my heart.

"I proved my doctors wrong. They thought I'd never be able to go to high school, let alone college. That I wouldn't be able to lead a normal life with how severe my anxiety was after the accident."

"You're strong. Brave."

"I'm a pain in the ass who doesn't like for people to tell him what he can and can't do."

"That too," I agree, placing my hand flat against his as I smile up at him.

"What I'm saying is your doctor could be wrong, dove. And if I'm inside you, with nothing between us, I know I won't be able to stop. I won't want to. The little tease I got last weekend was enough for me to know how amazing it felt with nothing between us, and I want more."

"What are you saying?"

Cupping my cheek with the hand that was covering my heart, I lean into Brady's touch and close my eyes. "That just for tonight, I hope your doctor is right."

He doesn't give me a chance to reply before he captures my mouth, his tongue sliding between my lips when I gasp. The way he holds me, the gentle caress of his hands, tells me he doesn't mean it maliciously. I'm still on birth control, and I thought about reminding him, but the words are now forgotten as he reaches around, squeezes my ass cheeks, and lifts, impaling me on the way down.

I'm full. Pleasure courses through my veins, and all I can think is that I want more.

Which Brady happily gives me.

Ten days isa long time to go without sex. Especially once you know what it's like. When you know how amazing it can be without barriers between you. How much more erotic it feels. Because you feel everything.

Not just physically, but emotionally.

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