Page 54 of Love is Strange
“You need to leave. You aren’t supposed to be here!” I tell him frantically.
“That’s not true. I just left Mrs. Welch’s office. That’s where I went after I walked out of here.”
“Well?” I ask.
“What?” He shrugs.
“What did you say, Ryan?” I exaggerate.
“She believes that, by some miracle, I can turn into this cunning young man and I told her I think dance is the perfect discipline for that. It would be the best outlet for me since it’s at school and it would get me away from the marvelous home I live in.” He says, stepping toward me. “I was able to bat my lashes and swoon her with a few fake tears. I’m allowed to stay after school for however long I want as long as you are on school property with me, teaching me lessons. At the end of the year—if I’m still here, that is—she wants to see what all I’ve learned.”
“You’re leaving?”
“That’s what you got out of all that?” He chuckles, a delicious smirk spreading on his face. “I think you like me Pretty Dancer.”
“I think you’re full of yourself. What happened yesterday will never happen again. Do you understand?” I tell him sternly. Crossing my arms over my chest, I take a step back and look at him, waiting for him to reply.
Ryan rolls his eyes. “Whatever you say, Pretty Dancer.”
“And you will call me Mrs. Emily, just like everyone else.”
“Whatever you say,Mrs. Emily.”
A sour feeling settles in my stomach when he calls me that. It’s doesn’t sound right coming from him.Stop it, I scold myself. I shake my head and stand straight.
“When do you want your lessons to start?”
Ryan shuts the door behind him and locks it, “Now.”
* * *
The sweet smellof my body wash and the delectable scent coming from him float around us. His proximity is killing me. His body is so close to mine, parts of him brushing against me, causing goosebumps to spread across my body. I made a promise to myself to stay professional and I plan to keep that promise.
I have too much to lose. I can’t let lust wrap her hands around my neck and take hold of me. Once was enough. Once should have never happened, and once will never happen again. When I look up and see Ryan looking down on me, I have to repeat to myself that once will never happen again because I really want for it to happen right now
T W E L V E
I’ve been sittingin my driveway for about ten minutes now. I didn’t come straight home after leaving the school, I needed time to think. I have yet to face my husband after what I did with Ryan. I don’t know if I can, but if I don’t, he will know something’s up. I sigh, leaning forward and place my forehead on the steering wheel. It feels like my heart in in my throat and I can’t breathe.
I’m such a terrible person.
Dan doesn’t deserve what I’ve done to him, and regardless of how I feel, I have to tell him…eventually. Not tonight, but I will.
“Who am I kidding?” I say to myself with a pitiful laugh. “I’m screwed.”
I wipe the snot from under my nose and check my face in the rearview mirror to make sure it doesn’t look like I was crying. Getting out of my car, I walk inside and shut the door behind me. My feet are killing me today, so I’m hoping I can fake my way into bed early. The less time I’m awake and around Dan, the less of a chance I have at opening my mouth and ruining my life even further.
“Em?” Dan calls out.
“It’s me!” Slipping out of my shoes, I walk into the kitchen and stop dead in my tracks. My stomach sinks to the floor as Ryan locks eyes with me. “What are you doing here?”
“My parents haven’t been home in a few days, and I knew you said if I needed anything, I could stop by. Was just wondering if you could help me with some groceries. I don’t mean to intrude.”
“Ryan was just telling me how you’ve taken him under your wing as a mentor.” Dan walks over to me and wraps me in his arms, “Aren’t you just the sweetest?” He leans down and kisses me. His lips on mine feel wrong now, especially in the eyes of the person who made it feel that way. Pulling away, I give Dan a small smile before I turn my attention to Ryan.
“I have a few things I can pack up for you, do you know how to cook?” I ask him, giving him pleading eyes, hoping he sees the desperation in them not to say anything.
“Yeah. I just—they usually leave enough money for me to get by until they come home. I feel bad for asking.”
