Page 58 of Love is Strange
The glass in my hand almost slips when I see Mrs. Welch standing at my front door on what was a beautiful Saturday morning. My heart feels like it has plummeted to my feet, weighing me down. I force a smile on my face and swallow hard before I set the glass of milk down on the end table and walk over to greet her.
“Mrs. Welch. Is everything okay?”
“I was hoping you could tell me.” She says, holding up an envelope. The front is blank, but it has already been opened. I take it from her when she extends her hand toward me. I do my best to steady my trembling hands as I take the single piece of paper out and open it.
Mrs. Welch,
I didn’t know who else to turn to, but I figured you would be the best start.
I messed up big time and before anyone gets hurt even further than what will ensue, I'm going to leave. I understand that you will have to notify my parents and the authorities but do me a solid and at least give me a 24-hour head start.
You were the only one to ever believe me. Sorry to let you down.
-Ryan.
My heart leapsfrom my feet to my throat in an instant, failing to beat on its way up. I blink back the tears that threaten to spill down my cheeks.
He left.
He just…left.
I look up at the school's counselor, folding the letter and placing it back in the envelope. Clearing my throat, I hand it back to her. “I—uh—I'm sorry, but I can't tell you what’s going on. The last dance session we had he was fine.”
Liar.
“I’m going to need you to come with me, Emily. Since you two hung out more than he did with anyone else during his short time here, I figured you could help in finding him.” She says sternly.
“Um. Yeah, just…just let me get dressed. I’ll meet you at the school.”
Before she has a chance to say anything else, I close the door in her face and turn around. Dan is standing behind me, looking worried. “I hope the kid is okay. He didn’t seem troubled when he came here.”
“Yeah.” I reply, pushing past him. Guilt and anger swell in the pit of my stomach as I dig through my drawers to find clothes. Why did he leave? Was it because of me? He was fine yesterday. Or maybe he wasn’t. I was too caught up in what we were doing to even notice anything but that.
“Do you want me to go with you?” Dan asks, walking into the bedroom.
“No, that’s okay. I won't be gone long. He's probably either pulling a prank or at a friends’ house.” I put force behind my words in hopes to convince more than just my husband. “I’m going to change.”
I give him a chaste kiss on the cheek before I walk into the bathroom and lock the door.
I strip down, taking a moment of pause to string my fingers along the small bruises on my waist from Ryan. Just touching them makes me quiver.
What if something bad happened to him? What if he can't be found? If he even wants to be found. I mean, if he didn’t, he wouldn’t have left a note.
I sigh, trying to rid my mind of the negative thoughts swirling in it. I will find him. I have too.
* * *
It’s beenabout four hours since a small search party has been sent out to find Ryan. I’ve been sitting in my car for the past ten minutes trying not to have a mental break down but to no avail. Tears run down my cheeks as I silently cry.
I know nothing about this kid, yet I feel so devastated that he ran away without so much as a goodbye. But that’s my fault for believing that I could have everything and him and get away with it.
I should have stayed inside my boundaries instead of stepping over them like they meant nothing. I was his teacher. Not his lover.
My phone rings. Snatching it up, I answer it frantically, hoping that by some miracle Ryan figured out my number and decided to reach out.
“Hello?” I sniffle.
“Hey, honey. How's it going out there, any luck?”
