Page 62 of Love is Strange
“Next thing you know, you’re signing divorce papers and half of all your shit is gone,” Gabe went on, agreeing with his buddy Decker. “I keep things simple. Her needs get met. My hunger gets satisfied. Then we go on about our lives like nothing ever happened.”
“Did you ever get a clinger?” Decker asked as he pounded another empty beer can on the table.
“Yeah…” Gabe replied with a chuckle. Although he did not elaborate, Decker knew an epic story would be the reason behind his devious grin.
“C’mon…” Decker begged as he cracked open another brewski. “Out with it.”
“What?” Gabe asked innocently enough. The glint of excitement in his eyes did not match the innocent expression he was trying to give.
“This I gotta hear,” Decker admitted. “Stage 5, high alert, danger danger clinger alert story. Now,” Decker demanded.
He could really be a persistent bugger when he wanted to be.
“Pushy!” Gabe replied in an exasperated tone of voice. “Fine. It was this chick named Sophia. I met her one night at Salon,” Gabe said referring to a night club that was situated across town. “We hit it off immediately. We have a few drinks, hit the dance floor. You know. The usual for Salon. It’s going great. I ask if I can give her a ride home, and she declines. Shocked the shit out of me, I could have sworn that she was down for a good time.”
“Lame, dude,” Decker replied, casting an agitate look at his friend. “So what happened?”
“The next morning is a Sunday. You know that is my one day a week where I can actually sleep in, relax, veg, and prepare for the work week ahead…”
“Yeah… you get pissed at me if I even suggest we do something on a Sunday…” Decker admitted, shaking his head. He didn’t quite understand Gabe’s need for a full day of nothing, but he was not about to question his friend’s reasoning behind it.
“Well,” Gabe continued. “That Sunday was not a quiet Sunday. Sophia, apparently likes to chat by text. Sophia sent me no less than three thousand text messages that day. I soon found out the reason why she did not want me to take her home the night before. Sophia was a ultra conservative bible thumper who was saving herself for marriage…”
“Wait,” Decker said, pulling Gabe’s retelling of his dating horror story to a full on stop. “A holy roller…. At Salon. Are you fucking shitting me?!”
“That was my exact reaction. Apparently her friends took her out for a night out on the town… and she thought I looked respectable enough…”
“Clearly she doesn’t know you…” Decker said with a smirk.
“Fuck off, man,” Gabe said with a laugh. “Anyhow, moving on… Apparently, Sophia thought that after spending a whole three hours with me that I would be a suitable match for her, and she wanted to talk about our “future.”
“Oh, this keeps getting better and better…” Decker said as he flagged down the waitress. “Another round…” he said to the waitress in a crude manner. Nodding her head, the blonde waitress turned, rolling her eyes as she went. Decker, as per his usual, was batting a thousand with the ladies. He did not have the luck that his buddy Gabe did in that department. To say he was envious was an understatement of epic proportions.
“So what did you tell her?” Decker asked, knowing full well what actions Gabe took when anyone tried to control any part of his life.
“Well, that’s where things got interesting…” Gabe added. “I eventually got bored and blocked her number. I thought that would have been the end of it… but then, the next day at work…”
“She showed up at your job?!” Decker said with a howling laugh. “Haha! This chick’s got balls!”
The irony of Decker’s statement was lost on him but it was not lost on Gabe who was staring at his buddy with a look of total mortification. “I swear, man… the shit that flies out of your face. It does not even hit a filter, does it?”
Shrugging his shoulders, Decker didn’t bother to answer Gabe’s question. “C’mon… Tell me what happened at work!”
“Oh, this keeps getting better and better…” Decker said as he flagged down the waitress. “Another round…” he said to the waitress in a crude manner. Nodding her head, the blonde waitress turned, rolling her eyes as she went. Decker, as per his usual, was batting a thousand with the ladies. He did not have the luck that his buddy Gabe did in that department. To say he was envious was an understatement of epic proportions.
“So what did you tell her?” Decker asked, knowing full well what actions Gabe took when anyone tried to control any part of his life.
“Well, that’s where things got interesting…” Gabe added. “I eventually got bored and blocked her number. I thought that would have been the end of it… but then, the next day at work…”
“She showed up at your job?!” Decker said with a howling laugh. “Haha! This chick’s got balls!”
The irony of Decker’s statement was lost on him but it was not lost on Gabe who was staring at his buddy with a look of total mortification. “I swear, man… the shit that flies out of your face. It does not even hit a filter, does it?”
Shrugging his shoulders, Decker didn’t bother to answer Gabe’s question. “C’mon… Tell me what happened at work!”
“Well, I got a call from security saying that a little brunette woman had slipped past security and was asking anyone who would listen to her where her ‘boyfriend’ Gabriel Cartwright’s office was.”
Decker’s eyes bugged wide as he let Gabe’s words sink into his mind. “This bitch is crazy!” he exclaimed loudly. Gabe noted that Decker appeared to be highly entertained by his misfortune in the murky scene of the dating world. If he had a bowl of popcorn he would have passed it right to him. Decker would have looked like he was watching one of his favorite flicks on the big screen.
