Page 153 of Tarnished Tyrant (Zhukova Bratva 1)

Anger surges up in me like lava. I’m ready to defend myself… Before I realize she isn’t too far off. Shame replaces my rage and I lower my head.

“I know how this looks from your perspective. If I was you, I’d hate me,” I admit. “But… I never meant for any of this to happen.”

“This?” she asks, gesturing between the two of us. “You never meant for me to find out? Or you never meant for—”

“Any of it,” I say hurriedly. “I had no idea you even existed. Well… I knew you existed. I saw you in the office at Zhukova Incorporated one day. Do you remember that?”

She frowns. “I remember.”

“I didn’t know Nikolai was engaged to you, though.”

Too many words to say and too many emotions to process clog my throat. I clear it, trying to stay calm. I need to squash down whatever I’m feeling and get through this so I can get out of here.

“I would never set out to be… to be the ‘other woman.’ I’m not a homewrecker, and I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

“You didn’t.”

I shake my head. “What?”

“You didn’t hurt me.”

I frown. “Then why are you here?”

She rearranges her skirts and purses her lips. “How much do you know?”

“Know about…” Realization hits all at once. “Oh. Everything, I think. Marriage deals, mafias, Bratvas. Yeah.”

“Good. So I can speak plainly, then.” Xena says it like it’s a relief. How many lies do these people have to tell to live the way they live? I can’t imagine it. “You can’t hurt me because I am not emotionally involved in anything with Nikolai.”

I nod. “That’s what he said, too. But I don’t buy it. Marriage is marriage. If you’re here to convince me to be your third or something—”

“I wasn’t finished.” Her voice is commanding, and I instinctively snap my mouth shut. “I’m not emotionally involved with Nikolai, but we’ve come to an arrangement. I expect it to be respected.”

“And what arrangement is that?”

“Our marriage formalizes the deal between the Greek mafia and Nikolai’s Bratva. And it is exclusive.You understand my meaning?”

“No, not really. I can’t understand marrying someone you don’t love. Why not just… I dunno, sign a contract?”

She shakes her head. “This way, we are twining ourselves together. My happiness is his and his is mine. Think of our lives as… collateral. If the deal falls apart, we both go down with it. It’s insurance.”

“High price to pay for insurance.”

“Perhaps,” Xena agrees. “But I grew up knowing that I would be used to secure a better future for my family. I’ve been prepared for this for a long time.”

“How do you prepare for something like this?” I wrinkle my nose and then shoot her an apologetic smile. “I’m not… well, I’m trying not to judge you.”

“I decided a long time ago that if my marriage won’t be one of love, it will at least be one of respect. I won’t let myself be made into a fool. And worse, I won’t sit by while my husband fucks whores in our house as I grow bitter and jaded. I won’t do it.”

“That… actually makes a lot of sense.”

Xena looks up at me. And for the first time since I let her into the suite, I remember that she has the capacity to kill me if she wants. Something in her eyes is sparking my fight-or-flight instincts.

Between those two, though, it’s not even a question. I’ll take “flight,” please and thank you. Preferably direct home to Oklahoma City, do not pass Go, do not collect two hundred dollars.

“So I need to know that you are done with Nikolai,” she finishes. “For good.”

Now is not the time for hesitation, but I hesitate anyway. I want to make sure I’m clear about what I’m giving up.

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