Molly
Theo is playing in the middle of his room, stacking blocks and knocking them down with a stuffed dinosaur toy, completely unaware of the danger we are now in.
How could I have let him out of my sight?
I walked into his room to check on him after Viktor and Fedor went into the office, and he was sleeping. I stayed in there for a few minutes, wanting to be there when he woke up, but then I had to go to the bathroom. I decided it would be better to go while he was sleeping, and then in the sixty seconds it took me to pee, Theo got out of bed and went to Viktor’s office.
It has become his routine over the last few weeks. Whether Viktor is home or not, Theo wakes up from his nap and pads across the hall to see if he’s there. He did that today and found much more than he bargained for.
His biological father. The sperm donor, as I’ve come to think of him.
Seeing the two of them in the same room made it obvious that there was some family relation, so I understand why Viktor said what he said. Why he claimed to be Theo’s father. But the thought still twists my stomach.
Not because I don’t like the idea of Viktor being Theo’s father. I like the idea of Viktor being the dad much more than the truth. The nausea comes from the fact that Viktor has just tied himself to Theo forever.
Theo and I can’t run and hide because Fedor will wonder what happened to Viktor’s son.
I drop my face into my hands and try to take deep breaths to calm the rapid beat of my heart. I’m still in that position when I hear the bedroom door open and Theo jumps to his feet, giggling as he runs towards Viktor.
I slide across the floor and lean against the side of Theo’s bed. I can see the exhaustion in Viktor’s face, but he hides it well as he smiles at Theo and then sends him off to keep playing.
“We need to talk,” he says quietly, tipping his head towards the hallway.
I’m about to say I don’t want to leave Theo alone, but then his nanny returns, and I push myself to shaky legs and follow Viktor down the hall.
I expect him to lead me downstairs, but instead he pushes open the door to his office and steps inside.
I’ve never been invited in before. Even earlier when Theo ran inside, I hovered in the doorway, too nervous to step into Viktor’s private space, especially when Fedor was inside as well.
Viktor ushers me in again, and I step inside. Circumstances have obviously changed now that Fedor is back. There is a lot to talk about, and we need privacy to do it.
The room is decorated in modern sweeps of white with warm wood accents. The wall of bookshelves to my right is full of books I can’t imagine Viktor reading and dotted with pictures. I see one of Viktor as a teenager, standing next to a shiny black car, and next to him is a younger boy. It takes me a second to recognize that the boy in the photo is not Theo but Fedor.
They could be twins.
“I didn’t know Fedor was getting out,” he says, dropping down into his chair. “If that wasn’t obvious. I found out and came home as soon as I heard, though it wasn’t fast enough.”
“How did he get out?” I ask the question with the smallest chance of crumbling the illusion of safety I’ve built for myself in this house.
Viktor leans back in the chair and runs a hand down his face, scraping his fingers across the stubble that coats his jaw. I haven’t told him, but I think he would look good with a beard. The last time he came into my room I got a red patch on my inner thighs from his short beard. When I press my legs together, I can still feel it.
“Bribery,” he says simply. “The lawyer was trying to get his charges lowered from murder to involuntary manslaughter, and when the legal system stopped working for them, they paid off a judge. He is on probation.”
“Probation for murdering someone?” The argument of nature versus nurture pops into my mind. I remember discussing it briefly in my high school biology class, but now I wish I’d paid much closer attention. How much of Theo’s personality will I be able to influence and how much will be genetic? Will he be impulsive and violent like his father?
“The situation was … complicated.” Viktor sighs. “The man was a business associate. He operated in the criminal world just like we did, and he disrespected Fedor. Or, at least, Fedor thought he did. He lost his temper.”
“And murdered someone,” I finish, nose wrinkled in disgust.
Viktor’s eyes snap to me, frustration flaming there. “Like I said, it’s complicated.”
“Murder isn’t complicated.”
“You wouldn’t know!” he snaps. “You don’t know this world, so you don’t know what it can be like.”
“You do,” I say softly. “You said you’ve murdered people.”
He nods.