Page 39 of Ripped Lace (Ripped Bratva)

I’m more like your fairy godmother. Anyhoo, top thinking so damn much. It’s always been one of your most annoying traits.

“I miss you.”

If you’re gonna get all sentimental on me, I’m leaving.

“Like you have a better place to be.”

Cheeky. Gotta say, I’m loving the new and improved you. You’re gonna get that arrogant hottie a run for his money.

“I’m no match for him, Charity.”

You’remorethan a match for him.

“You don’t understand. I… I… still have feelings for him. Despite—well, despite everything.”

Yeah, duh. I get that.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

He’s everything you didn’t have growing up. A strong man, one who’s powerful and confident and knows what he’s doing, what he wants, how to get it. A protector, not a manipulator. Not to mention he’s sexy as sin. I mean… you’re only human.

“He’s keeping me from Theo. I should hate him.”

Don’t you?

“A part of me does.”

And the rest of you?

“The rest of me longs for the man who taught me to swim.”

He’s still in there somewhere.

“How do you know?”

Becauseyoubelieve it. That’s how.

I take a deep breath and try to expel Charity’s voice from inside my head. I’m not sure if it’s doing more harm than good. But I’m realizing more and more how much I’m relying on the conversations.

Although, can you really even call them conversations if they’re happening inside your head? I’m basically just talking to myself.

Overthinking again, are we?

I grin, despite myself. “I would never.”

If coping mechanisms are what you need to deal with my death, use them. It won’t always be so painful. Things heal in time.

“Yes, it will,” I whisper. “It’ll always hurt.”

You have to survive in the meantime, Elyssa. For Theo’s sake.

I glance towards the red dress spread out next to me. I reach out and run my hands over the fine silk.

“It’s so beautiful,” I murmur.

You want to wear it.

“Is that bad?” I hang my head in shame.

---