Page 76 of Ripped Lace (Ripped Bratva)

“Do you want to hold him?”

I glance at her with more shock than the question deserves. She gives me a nervous smile.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I mutter eventually.

Her lips screw up in a stubborn expression that looks an awful lot like what I remember of Charity. “Just try,” she replies. Then, without dallying anymore, she thrusts him into my arms.

Surprised, I cradle him carefully. Elyssa gnaws on her lower lip as she watches us. I slide my gaze down to lock eyes with the boy. He looks up at me suspiciously for a moment.

She reaches out to stroke his thigh and gives him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, my little angel,” she coos gently. “You’re safe with him.”

His bottom lip goes wobbly for a moment, but he doesn’t actually cry. He looks back and forth between the two of us, right on the precipice of bursting into tears.

And then, just as suddenly, he eases up. The lip stops shaking. The chubby smile returns.

“See? You’re a natural.” Elyssa smiles triumphantly.

Clearing my throat, I deposit him back in Elyssa’s arms before she can protest. I don’t want to admit it, but holding him is painful.

It’s just a reminder of everything I lost. Everything I could still lose.

I can feel her watching me as I turn and stalk up towards the estate, but I ignore her gaze. I don’t need any more guilt. I have a lifetime’s worth already.

When we get to the back gates, Leona is standing on the deck, waiting for us.

“It’s almost time for Theo’s nap,” she calls over as we approach.

“I can put him to sleep,” Elyssa offers.

“Oh, no need,” Leona replies quickly. “It’s my job.”

I chuckle. “I thought babysitting wasn’t really your thing, Leona,” I point out. “You sure griped about it when I assigned you the job.”

“Hey, I don’t have a man in my life, okay?” she says defensively. “I got attached to this little guy.”

Elyssa smiles. “I don’t blame you.”

I notice how Elyssa’s arms tighten around Theo when Leona draws close, but she bites down on her lower lip and hands him over without a fight. Jealousy sparks at the corner of her eyes as Leona swoops Theo up and disappears into the house.

Without thinking, I put my arm around her. She gives a little jerk of surprise before looking up at me. I don’t offer an explanation apart from a small smile.

“It’s hard letting him go,” she confesses in a soft voice. “And I know it’s ungracious, but I just don’t want to be… forgotten.”

“You’re his mother, Elyssa,” I remind her quietly. “No one can take your place.”

“He’s not even six months old yet,” she points out. “Anyone can be his mother at this point.”

I frown. “And you think I’d let that happen?”

She bites her lip. A little harder this time. “We don’t know what the future holds,” she says with uncertainty.

I understand what she means.

The paternity test.

Her memory loss.

The dark shadows of the past that follow each of us.

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