Page 2 of The Fire and the Roar

The dimples finally made an appearance. Her tongue shot out and swiped her bottom lip, and I let out a small laugh.

Every. Single. Time.

I’d been on the road with these guys for months, and I knew their tells pretty well now. When each one was bored, or wired from pills, or horny, or brewing frustration into all-out anger and ready to blow, I knew.

There had been breaks in between, where some of them had gone home to South Dakota. I had once, but it had been upsetting. My old man, Wreck, and I were pretending we’d broken up. Underworld outlaws, including my fabulous ex-husband and his MC, were after my brother Leo for money, for his meth operation, for revenge. And since Leo had disappeared into thin air, they might come after me to smoke him out, so I was a nomad, playing it solo. A nomad being watched because I wasn’t “hiding out” per se, but I was being a “normal” singer in a new rock band who’d just broken up with her boyfriend and took off on tour to be all free and shit.

Free.

Although I was free to pursue my dream now, my cousin Georgia having taken over running our family’s general store in town, it didn’t feel so very “free.” Not like I’d imagined it would be.

I was lying again.

I used to lie to my family about singing. I’d sneak out of the house to go to different clubs and bars and parties to sing in the wee hours or catch a favorite band performing. All the while, I’d dream about one day being on my own and wild and free to do what I wanted, which was tour with my own band, and live like a bohemian creative.

I was doing all that now, and it felt so good, right. Powerful. But I was still living a lie, a different lie, looking over my shoulder and separated from my new passion, my man, Wreck.

I should be grateful I was finally chasing my dream, part of a band, making music, performing. I was. I only wished…

Stop.

The bottle got put in my hands again, and I took a long glug.

When all this crap had broken out with my brother, Wreck could have put me in some sort of lockdown situation by sending me away to the Jacks’ brother chapter in Colorado to stay there under lock and key for months. But he hadn’t done that.

“They’re your dreams, and you deserve to make them come true.”He told me that. What man tells you that? Only Wreck.

Wreck found a way to let me make my dreams come true, but we had to make sacrifices, like be separated and pretend we’d broken up. All under the watchful eyes of Wreck’s club brothers, the One-Eyed Jacks MC, and their friendly clubs, in every state I traveled to.

“Let’s take this party back to our motel, huh?” Teddy, our bassist, said in a loud voice. He shut the clasps on his guitar case. “Let’s get some booze and get going. You coming with?”

“Sure!” The girl interviewing Len quickly put her notepad and cassette recorder away. “I have a few friends with me—”

“More the merrier.” Len winked. Mary Jane stood at the back exit, holding the door open for us as we filed out. Len stopped and flirted with her some more, planting a kiss on her cheek as he strode out the door.

Even though it had been a less than stellar response from the audience tonight, we’d performed at our usual intensity. Now, my adrenaline simmered my current bubbly cocktail of disappointment and a dash of futility. Yes, let’s make merry.

“You’re a pretty thing, you know that? Real hot up there singing.”

“Oh, thanks,” I said to the rosy-cheeked bar manager.

“Can I offer you a special drink?” He leaned over me, a clammy hand landing on my thigh.

“Absolutely not.” I shoved his hand off my leg.

“Hey now—” He got even closer, a putrid smell filling my nostrils. Dirty laundry, stale beer.

“Is, let’s go.” Stewart cuffed my neck with his hand, and I pushed up off the chair, my arm sliding around his middle. The bar manager wiped at his mouth.

“Goodnight!” I said.Ugh. “Get me out of here already.”

“Yeah. Time to party.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Chapter Two

We goton our bus and made our way back to the next town over where our motel was. The town was a typical desolate one road affair like most around here. We were all about the cheap and inexpensive, so this crap motel in between towns was perfect. We were the only guests there tonight. Big plus.

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