Page 84 of Cougar

“Hey, girl,” she replies, still smiling as she sets her phone down and rises from her chair behind the manicure table. “Have a seat.” She holds out her hand to take my purse, then gestures to one of the pedicure chairs lined up on the opposite side of the room.

She straddles the stool and turns on the water to as hot as I can stand it. “So what’s new this week?”

I fill her in on Harper, which leads to me spilling the family secret about Willow being Cole’s daughter. By the time I’m finished, we’re both in tears.

“I think you should talk to Max and Jessica first. Maybe sit down with Harper and talk to her as well.”

“Yeah, I’m definitely going to do that. I just want to be careful. I don’t want her to feel like I’ve betrayed her either, but my family comes first.”

“True that.”

As she’s putting the final coat of polish on my toenails, I relax against the leather head rest and exhale a long breath. “I need your advice.”

Lisa’s lips pull to the side. “Does this have anything to do with a certain ball player?”

My eyes go wide as I tilt my head down to look at her with pinched brows. “Wh—how did you know?”

She lets out a light laugh. “Well for starters, that night at dinner, I saw the way your face lit up when you saw him at the table.”

“Oh my God.” I press my palm to my forehead. “Was I that obvious?”

“Not at all.” She shakes her head. “You just looked really happy to be surrounded by friends.”

“I don’t know what to do. I like him… a lot.” I immediately laugh at my admission. “And we’re back in high school.” I alter my voice to sound like a teenager. “I like him a lot.”

Lisa and I both laugh at my expense, but my laughter quickly dies and turns into a sigh. “It’s too soon, right?”

Lisa frowns, looking confused. “Too soon for what? To be happy? To be with someone who makes you feel good?” She’s saying all the right things, but it doesn’t squash how I feel.

“All of it. Let’s not forget the fact that he’s too young for me.”

“Says who?”

I shrug. “Me? He’s twenty-eight.”

Lisa laughs. “Emerson, he’s not a teenager. He’s a man. A fine-ass man.” She waggles her eyebrows. “You feel guilty,” she states matter-of-factly.

“Of course I feel guilty.” I rub my hand over my heart. “Marcus was the love of my life and the only man I’ve ever been with.”

“I felt the same after Felix.” She tilts her head. “Listen, I know how much you loved Marcus. Your daughter knows how much you loved him. Your family knows how much you loved him. You want me to tell you it’s okay to be with someone else? It is. But when you choose to move on is up to you. Moving on with your life doesn’t mean you’re letting go of your love for Marcus. If you’re worried about people judging you, they will. And if you’re having doubts, then I’d say you’re not ready. Your heart will tell you when it’s time. Will you ever stop feeling guilty? Probably not. Not because you’ve moved on, but because you’re living your life and you feel as though Marcus didn’t get to live his. But the truth is Marcus did live his life. He was successful and rich. He had a beautiful wife and daughter. And he was loved. I’d say he lived his best life. Same goes for Felix. We were young, but he was doing what he loved. And he had a wife and child who loved him. It was hard for me to move on. Not because I didn’t want to, but it wasn’t easy dating with a toddler. I was so young, and I wanted to go out and have fun like all the girls my age.”

“At least you were still young when you started over.”

“Yeah, and you know what that got me? Nothing but a long list of immature boys and losers. Felix was young but he was a man. None of those other boys could measure up. Finally, I just gave up on dating altogether and focused on raising my son and building my business. I guess in a way, I’m starting all over, too. Thanks to you.” She winks. “Have I thanked you for introducing me to that gorgeous man? Gah.” She shudders in a good way. “I swear I have to pinch myself to remind me that he’s real.”

I laugh out loud. It’s good to see my friends happy.

“So have you slept with him yet?” she asks.

“God, no. I’m not ready for that. We’ve kissed a couple of times, that’s all. Last night he made me dinner.”

I go on to tell her about my dinner with Cam and how he asked me to spend more time with him when the season is over.

“I say go for it, Emerson. What have you got to lose besides sleep?” she snickers.

Everything.

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