Page 45 of Painting Her Fate

Bloodyhell. What worries me is not knowing if I’m strong enough to keep my barriers intact. Can I keep my walls erected? One night of fun won’t hurt. Or would it?

I can ruin this man, ruin him for all other women without a thought, as I have done before with others…

But that isn’t me any longer.

The electric kettle chimes the same time he begins to speak, saving me from the awkward moment as I busy myself. I feel my cheeks flush and that was from just one single glance from him. I could sense him taking me in- I ignored it- ignored him.Stay in control.

I take the set of mugs and head to the sofa, placing them on the coffee table, then plop myself next to him. The thing is big enough we both can lounge on, however I wanted to be right here.

In my haste of coming back to my flat the other day I didn’t have time to pick up any biscuits, something I mention to Zander. He is silent in a way that conveys he isn’t in the mood for biscuits.The feeling is mutual.

A scene of Sam and Dean vanquishing a demon plays on the tele. I glance at him from the corner of my eye. He is watching me instead of the screen, wonder in his eyes. I suddenly feel self-conscious.

“What is it?” I turn my head and lift a brow, his smile only spreading. His gaze wanders around my features and I happen to do the same. I nibble my lower lip and his eyes watch the movement.

He shifts closer, so close I can feel his body heat- it’s radiating. I want that, and more. Zander’s voice is low, eyes filled with mystery, “you. You’re beautiful.”

“Oh, come off it.” I scoff, “and you said Ford was delusional. You may be the one instead filling that category.” I wave away his complement, my cheeks telling a different tale. He smiles softly and I can’t look away.

Do it Lili, make him be quiet. Shut this man up and kiss him already. It’s time we play.

“I mean it. You are intoxicating to me.” Zander expresses, not backing down.

Out of habit my brows together in a scowl, although I find I’m not as mad as I should be. It’s a different sensation coming from him. He of course notices my agitation and tries making my grimace disappear. Hesitating just a second, his hand tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, his thumb brushing leisurely across my cheek. I can’t help but flutter my eyelids closed at the foreign touch.What is this man doing to me? I can’t stay in control, and, holy fuck, my body’s reaction towards him just about frightens me.

Whatever this is, I need more.

Pounce already, or I will!My mistress is quick to chime.

The flecks of hazel in his eyes stand out against the cool darkness and I’m cast under his spell. My pulse races, focusing on how stunningheis, how strong he is. My breath hitches as I watch his pupils dilate and his lips part the slightest bit. This man is turned on and I find I’m riled up as well.So many dirty thoughts.Part of my mind says to stop this, to go to bed alone, to not give in this time, to not allow the mistress her fun and games. But the feelings are too intense.

Finish what we started at the bookstore; you know you want to.

No more waiting, no more shutting myself out from the world. It’s time to live in the here and now.

I turn my body to face his, cup his jaw with both hands then lean forward and crash my lips on his. There is no more hesitation as those strong subtle hands of his wrap around my waist, pulling me tighter, our battle over who is controlling this moment only just beginning.

*Tsking* Ah-ah, love. It’s the mistress who will triumph tonight.

He deepens our kiss and my lips part on their own accord, my knickers dampening with every second that passes. I slipped my tongue inside his mouth, swirling it around, savoring his taste, and egging him on for more. My demand to control how fast this goes is slipping through my grasp.

I bring a leg over to straddle his waist, my hands sifting through his soft hair, finding raised bumps littering the back of his scalp.

He has scars too, Lili. His walls are just as erect as yours.

His mouth moves down my jaw to land at my throat where he begins to nibble. I tilt my head to the side and let out a moan.Pure intoxication. For once I allowed myself to relish in his touches, to give myself, I’ll be it a small piece, over to him. There is a first for everything.

He pauses, a cautious hunger in eyes, “are you okay with this?”

“You would know if I wasn’t. Now, don’t stop.” I command, a bit breathless myself as I ground my pelvis against the ridge of his jeans.

He releases a throaty groan then devours my mouth once more, our

tongues dancing, body temperatures rising and syncing as we grind. I grab the hem of my shirt and raise it over my head, parting our kiss just long enough to fling it over the sofa. With my laced bra on full display, his hand immediately cups my breast, massaging and needing, then plucking at the nipple through the thin fabric.

I arch into his touch and hiss out a breathy, “Yes.”I need more. Give me more Alexander.

He’s quick to lose his shirt, his imposing growl sending shivers of submission through me.

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