Page 95 of Painting Her Fate

I pull out my phone to find a message from Blake, saying Hank seemed off today. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I have the answer as to why. Hank didn't want to leave Lili in the state she was in. He knew something was wrong and wanted nothing more than to be by her side and comfort her. I felt the exact moment she disconnected from the present and went to live inside her head. I wasn’t going to disobey her by staying, but when Hank wouldn't come when commanded, I had to carry his ass out of the condo building and put him in my truck.

Is she ok? Maybe I should send her a text.

Give her space, it’s what she wanted.Right. As Ford said. Give her some space.

I sling my phone on the arm of the couch, grab the tv remote and begin scrolling through the guide. I hate television but I’m able to find a halfway decent show for background noise.

Hank perks up when I pat the couch cushion next to me, offering for him to hop up here. He hesitates at first, knowing he is never allowed on the furniture, but once he is on my lap, he sniffs my face, licks my cheek a couple times, then submits his head down for me to pet him. I lift the button to open the footrest on the end of the couch, propping my feet up and extending back in a way I haven’t done in ages. I still have good days and bad days, but I’m learning how to better manage, although it be easier to do so with Lili.

Staring blankly at the screen as I stroke Hank’s head, my mind is stuck on the girl who ended everything before it even had a chance to begin, and me, the sorry sack of shit who made her do it.

Five days. Five agonizing days and I have not heard from her.

Everyone at the bar seemed to walk on eggshells when around me today.

Was I really that snippy?

Ford stomped his way in my office and slammed the door behind him. He looms over me, his large body blocking out some of the light. His palm met my desk with a loudSmack!Ford only does that if he is absolutely pissed about something.

“Alright corporal, you listen here. I can’t take seeing you like this one more second.” His tone reminds me of our patrols, all focus. He scoffs, “Fuck man. Let her go.”

Not intimidated, I shake my head and turn my gaze away, “I-.”

“You’re goin’ on the fifth day of not hearing from her, right?” He interrupts, I nod, “Well, I hate to break it to ya, but she isn’t callin’. It’s women’s law, or somethin’.” He gives a shrug and plops down on the loveseat.

Releasing a weary sigh, I stand from my chair and round the desk.

“It’s not like that.”

Not hearing any response from Lili these past days, I resorted to texting my sister to see if she’s heard from her. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I turn it on and wait for it to load.

“So, you goin’ to stop being ahijo de puta (cocksucker)at some point?” Ford asks, checking me over. His face morphs into one of understanding at whatever emotions he finds, “Awe shit. You have fallen hard for her.”

I don’t say anything as our eyes lock in that unspoken bond we share, then I glance away seeing nothing but his God damn pity.

“Well, if you weren’t being such a d-hole these past few days, I would’ve helped you out, Zander. You don’t have to go through this alone.” He taps my jaw in disapproval, “and for Christ sake, you’re starting to look like a gnarly caveman.”

“I kinda like it.” I mock, knowing he’s going to protest, “Lili doesn’t mind the scruff.”

He stands and claps me on the shoulder, “You’re way past scruff, therecompadre (buddy).It’s not the look for you. At least give it a trim.” He snaps his fingers recalling something, “speakin’ of Lili, didn’t she mention her dad was comin’ home soon?”

How did I forget about that? “Yeah, a couple days ago.” I see where he’s going with this. I’ve been living in my head day after day, and she’s busy taking care of her dad. I am such an asshole. I release some tension in an exhale, “that makes more sense now.”

Ford’s yip of excitement isn’t missed, “it be nice to see her at the Dyngus day festivities this weekend.”

I shrug, defeated, “I doubt Lili will go.” We were supposed to see the parade together, then head over to my parents for a Gorski family celebration. I pray it doesn’t snow this year. Glancing down at my phone, I find a message from my sister, no messages from Lili. “Emma wants me to stop over.”

“What are you waitin’ for? She could be there. Go, Corporal, I’ll close up.” He none too gently pushes me out of the office, “Go get your woman.”

For the first time in a few days, I’m going to do more than just sit here and wallow.

I’m going to get Lili back.My woman.

I knock on my sister’s door and try catching my breath from my sprint here. The second she opens her door I ask, “is Lili in there?” As soon as I enter the space, I can sense no one else is here. Emma’s attire should’ve hinted to that. She’s never one to wear her bathrobe in the presence of company.

“Sorry Zander, Lili isn’t here, we cancelled game night. Gavin had a date, and the other couple has morning sickness.” Her sadness strikes right through my heart. I wish there was a way I could help; Emma and Wyatt would make amazing parents.

I’m defeated, in more ways than one. I can’t help my sister with her problems, and I’m unable to resolve the situation with Lili. “Has she said anything to you?” My look must give me away as I see her shoulders slump.

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