Page 59 of Spiders in the Grove

“I do anything for Naeva,” Leo says. “Besides, fighting is all I know. It all I ever done.”

“Well, you’ve been relieved of your contract with Javier Ruiz,” I tell him. “He’s dead. I killed him.”

Naeva’s eyes slowly brighten, followed by a thankful smile; I can tell she wants to wrap her arms around me, and she would if she wasn’t in the front seat and I in the back.

Leo’s face never changes. In fact, he doesn’t say anything. And I don’t ask why.

The rest of the ride is quiet.

As we approach the El Paso border, I brace myself for whatever scene plays out with border patrol agents there. None of us exactly look like innocent American tourists coming back from fun in the sun on a Mexican beach. We look like we just escaped a compound and killed a hundred people on our way out. I still have the semi-automatic—illegal in Mexico—it’s laying on the seat beside me. And Leo Moreno is still Mexican, and I’m not sure about his legal status in the United States. In fact, I doubt anyone has any sort of ID on them—I sure as hell don’t. I’m pretty sure the car was stolen, too.

Leo pulls up for his turn at the crossing, and two border patrol agents approach the car. They look inside. One notes the gun on the seat; the bloodstained clothes; the everything-wrong-about-this-picture.

Leo hands the other agent a yellow slip of paper; the agent looks down at it, and then he blinks a few times as understanding spreads over his features.

A moment later, after the second agent comes around to inspect the paper too, they wave us on quicker than anyone else.

“What was that?” Naeva asks Leo.

“Documentation from Javier,” he answers, keeping his eyes on the Texas road ahead of him. “My first new fight is going be in El-lay-ah.”

“El-lay-ah?” I ask.

“L.A.,” Naeva clarifies.

I knew that already—I speak fluent Spanish—so I’m not sure why I forgot. Maybe now that Javier is really dead, and I’m done with Mexico, the things I learned there will fall away with it. I doubt it.

Leo said “is” not was—he’s still going to fight even though, with Javier dead, he doesn’t have to. I wonder how Naeva feels about that. Again, I don’t ask. It’s none of my business, and while a part of me is a little curious, the rest of me has more important things to think about.

The sky is gray-yellow over the Texas landscape, the early morning sun still waking up on the horizon. I lay down on the backseat next to the gun and shut my eyes, but I don’t fall asleep. Too much on my mind. Like what I’m going to do next, where I’m going, how much of what Javier told me that I’m going to tell Victor. Maybe I won’t tell him anything yet. I began this mission on my own, and I’d like to finish it the same way. I may be done with Mexico, but technically, I’m not done.

~~~

Sometime during the ride, I did eventually fall asleep, because now as my eyelids crack open to the sound of Naeva’s voice, I realize I’m back in Arizona. Back at home.

“Sarai, we’re here,” she says; I feel her hand on my shoulder.

I raise up from the seat, surprised I could’ve slept so long and so well after everything I’d just been through, all the people I killed. Cesara. Joaquin. Javier. The ones without names. The only person who died in Mexico that I think about though, is Sarai. But she died a long time ago, and I wasn’t the person who killed her. Or was I?

I get out of the car.

“You can come inside and rest for a while,” I offer, leaning on Naeva’s open window.

“Gracias,” Leo says, always so kind and respectful for a man who’s probably killed more men than me. “But we need to get to El-lay-ah. People expecting me.”

I nod. “Thank you for the ride.”

“De nada,” Leo says.

Naeva gets out of the car and finally gets her arms around me. “I owe you everything, Sarai,” she says, squeezing me. “I wish I could’ve helped more, but in the future, if you ever need anything from me, don’t hesitate to ask. I don’t care what it is.” She pulls away, holds my elbows in her hands, and looks into my eyes, and I can’t help but see Huevito standing there. “Thank you,” she says at last.

I smile softly at her, and she gets back inside the car with Leo. They drive away, and I wonder if they’ll make it. Not to Los Angeles. Not as a couple—they’ll be in love until the day they die—but I wonder if they’ll make a life together before they’re murdered. Because it’ll happen eventually. A name and face like Leo Moreno’s is both a gift and a curse. I hope their love can last a lifetime. I hope they make it.

I hope my and Victor’s love can be half as obvious as theirs one day.

I hope we make it…

After fishing for the house key in the soil of a potted plant, I step inside my house and immediately detect something is off, though I’m not sure what. Maybe it’s that I’ve been gone so long, or that I got used to hearing Apollo shouting at me from the basement. It’s so quiet in here, so empty. It’s actually kind of nice having him gone and me having the house to myself. But that’s only temporary as I’ve got to bring him back soon and finish what I started. I just hope Fredrik hasn’t killed him.

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