Page 65 of What Hurts Us

Layla made me want things I knew I couldn’t have. But maybe just one night… Just for tonight… I could let myself hold her and pretend that this was real. That I could hold her goodness in my arms and not taint it.

That I could be selfish and have her all to myself.

But I didn’t deserve her.

I didn’t deserve any of this.

But for one night, I would pretend that I did.

I kissed the top of Layla’s head, allowing my lips to linger in her silky hair. She snuggled in closer as if she was one with my body. I shifted, turning onto my side and pulling her tight against my chest.

Lying beside her felt like heaven. It felt like every resentment I held tight was being slowly flushed out of my system.

Carefully, I tipped my head down and kissed her forehead, then the tip of her nose, then a soft brush of her lips. Because that’s all I could ever have. Stolen pieces of her.

* * *

I awoke to an empty bed.I could hear Layla frantically rushing around downstairs as she hustled out the door, already running late for work. AB, John, or whoever she was relieving from the night before would be pissed if she wasn’t there on time.

I lay in bed for a few more minutes, waiting until I heard the slam of the door as she ran out to her car. When I closed my eyes, I could still feel her lying in my arms. I could still feel her leg wedged between mine. I could still smell the faint aroma of her perfume mixed with wine on the pillows.

Layla was the most potent kind of drug—the type that had you hooked for life after just one hit.

I needed to detox.

Needed to redraw the boundaries.

Needed to remind both of us that this was a mutually beneficial arrangement.Nota relationship.

Not a connection that would last into the winter.

We were leaves turning from average green to bright yellows, becoming brilliant versions of ourselves. We were seemingly at the peak of our existence. But winter would come, and we would fly far from each other at the whim of the wind and weather.

Nothing lasted, especially not love. Especially not relationships. Layla and I both needed to be reminded of that.

I hurried through my routine of shit and shave before pulling on my uniform, fastening my duty belt, and hurrying out the door.

As I navigated my cruiser through Falls Creek’s bustling downtown, a small sedan made a half-assed rolling stop through a stop sign, then gunned it well over the speed limit, heading out of town.

I lit up my lights and sirens. I didn’t miss the way the driver slammed their hand against the steering wheel in frustration before turning on their hazards and pulling off the road.

I sat in my cruiser for a moment, running the license plate.

Fuck. Me.

I had just pulled over my fiancé.

And, being that this was Falls Creek, everyone had poked their head out of their houses, shops, and cars to watch.

I grumbled curses under my breath as I got out of my car, slowly approaching hers as if it was any ol’ traffic stop. Out of habit, I pressed my fingertips to the tail light, leaving a print.

When I made it to the driver’s side door, she had the window rolled down and was already shoving her license and registration at me. Layla took one look at me, eyes widening, then narrowing in disdain. “What thefuck?”

“Do you know why I pulled you over this morning, ma’am?” I asked, hands on top of my belt.

Layla’s lip curled. “Oh, don’tma’amme,Officer Fletcher.What the fuck are you doing pulling me over? I’m already late!” She pinched the bridge of her nose and most likely immediately regretted yelling. That wine hangover must be a bitch. She had probably made a stop for the sports drink in the cup holder before trying to speed her way to the AirCare base.

“You failed to come to a complete stop at the sign, Miss Mousavi.” I pointed back to the intersection she had just driven through.

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