“Did too!”
“Did not!”
“Did too!”
“Did not!” She stomps her foot.
“Did too, but don’t worry, I won’t do it again. Unless you beg me and beg me you will.”
“I will not!”
“You will.”
“I will not!”
“You will. One day you’ll say the words. You’ll beg me to kiss you. And I just might give in.”
“Will not!”
“You will.”
I smile at her and walk away. I worked up an appetite.
* * *
I don’t walk straight backto the house. I go around the barn first and up to the fenced pasture that houses several horses. I have to get my head on straight first and walk off the raging hard-on in my pants.
What the fuck is wrong with me? Why did I try to kiss her? I don’t even like her. She has a foul mouth, and she’s too cocky for her own good.
Okay, I reason. She’s beautiful. And hot. And she was rubbing her ass on me. Had I read it all wrong? No. I don’t think so. I saw it in her eyes. She was surprised at first, yes, but I saw how her gaze dropped to my mouth and how she licked her lips in anticipation. She may not even know she was doing it. It was not the studied seductive move I’ve seen so many times from the girls I knew in school and the preppy neighborhood I grew up in.
As free as River voices her opinions about everything and as much as she talks the talk, there’s a certain innocence about her that’s at odds with her words and her behavior. It’s . . . intriguing.
I’ve been an ass, too. I admit. I’ve been an ass from day one if I’m to be honest about it. I didn’t set out to be an asshole. It wasn’t my default mode, but that first meeting set the tone for all our meetings afterward. In the beginning, I was just angry. Not at her, but that day she dumped her drink on me, she became the target of my anger. Had it been a guy, I’m sure I would’ve knocked him out cold. I haven’t been back home long and adjusting to a normal life seems impossible for now. But each day I push myself to move forward and leave all that happened in the past. They say the hardest part of coming back home is leaving the war behind. It follows you. In your thoughts and your dreams. I’ve been back stateside for five weeks. Sometimes it feels like seconds, sometimes it feels like years. It’ll change. I’ll change. I have to go back to being me again. I’m tired of the man I’ve become and I don’t like him very much.