Page 2 of Imbalanced Minds

Chapter One

Iris

I rip the page from my journal and screw it up, ready to burn in my bathroom rubbish bin. I never thought I’d be put in this position, be the one having to write thoughts and feelings on paper again to avoid clamming up or becoming unhinged. I thought I was past that.

Quite often, I’m left with my thoughts and they aren’t always pleasant. More often than not, I’ll ponder over scenarios of why did I let that happen? Or what would happen if I acknowledged the abuse earlier?

Many thoughts fight for supremacy. Generally, when I’m tired or having a bad day. There’s never a certain time, it just happens.

The bad.

The ugly.

The sad.

I used to be the happy go lucky girl with a big group of friends. Now I’m nothing but a disheartened woman. It’s shocking what another person can do to your psyche.

After lighting the paper, I watch as the flame dances, mesmerised by the way the bright flicker moves to its own beat. It’s somewhat enchanting watching something burn.

As the paper turns to ash, I prepare the glass of water to extinguish any flickers of heat that may be present. Satisfied with my efforts for tonight, I make my way back to my bedroom mentally prepared for a night out. Ready to ignore any tiny murmurs that I’ve gotten used to locking away and readying myself to convince Natalie a night on the town is a good idea.

Reaching for the wine bottle I left on my nightstand and the stilettos I placed by my bed earlier, I straighten my spine and march toward the lounge.

“Babe, you have to come out with me tonight, please…” I plead with my best friend. “I haven’t had a night out with you in forever and I need to break my new heels in. You know, these sexy red ones you told me I needed and would look killer hot with the little black dress I also bought?” I exaggerate as she sits on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and the TV remote in hand.

“Seriously, Iris? I went out with you last weekend and look at what happened then. We both ended up with Justin putting our sorry butts to bed.” Nat smirks, obviously remembering being ‘put to bed’ by my older brother, Justin, who also happens to be her boyfriend.

Squirming with disgust, I move in front of her with my heels in hand and a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc tucked under my other arm. “C’mon… I can’t go out and get a certain hotties attention if I don’t have my wing woman,” I cry out in my I’ll get my own way voice, “and besides, Justin told me today he was checking out this new club downtown, so I know you won’t object if lover boy’s going to be there.”

I throw extra effort into the pout of my lower lip and angle my head to get the puppy dog eyes effect just right.

Nat’s scoff breaks me from my pathetic attempt at grovelling and ribbing of her. A cushion then takes me unaware, hitting me in the face causing my stumble backward.

“Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. You know you’ll end the night ass-over-tits drunk and emotional all over again.”

“Pfft, you don’t even know what you’re talking about. It’ll be different this time. I’m in control of this hot mess and any guy that comes my way will be putty in my hands.” I confidently express while waving an awkward hand up and down my body. “Now, are you coming with me or am I a loner?”

Getting up, Nat skulks toward me before jumping at me excitedly and yelling in my face. “Let’s do this!”

I always know Nat will cave in situations like these. She can’t help it; some part of her acts as mother hen towards me. It’s a little mean I admit, playing her kindness to my own needs but she’s my best friend and I need her right now.

With a cautious step back to gain my footing and a victorious smile on my face, I raise the bottle of wine to salute the beginning of what I hope to be the do-over I so desperately need after a shitty week. My mind has been a highway for the majority of my thoughts. Jumping to conclusions and self-doubt are generally what’s passing through, never having the willpower to switch them off.

Nat’s waffling on about something in the bathroom as we get ready, but all I can think about is how I’m going to attract said hottie tonight. By thatI mean Cory.

I have to admit, I’m most likely coming on with stalker tendencies or even worse—looking extra desperate—but every time I look at him, I can’t help the heat that floods my body.

It makes me think back to when he first moved to our school; the first day we met before my brother ruined everything.

Speed walking down the hallway trying my hardest not to be any later for class than I already am, I get distracted looking for the time on my watch and collide with something hard, which sends me flying backward onto my arse.

Letting out an almighty, “Oomph,” I take a deep breath, pick up my books which are scattered around me and right myself to standing.

Using the one free hand I have, I go to wipe the dust off my bum then realise there’s a tall figure shadowing over me. Slowly looking up, enjoying the view as I go, I’m met with what looks close to be six feet of pure God.

His dark brown hair which unless in the light you’d think was black and those mischievous smoky grey eyes, a girl could definitely get used to being knocked down like this.

Clearing his throat, he starts talking to me and I admit, I find it hard to concentrate as I watch those delicious rosy lips moving up and down.

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