Page 123 of Bitter Lies

Am I? Fuck.

Grabbing my chin, he says succinctly, “What do you need money for?”

“A lawyer! Okay? A fucking lawyer.”

His brows fly over his forehead, before they lower in confusion. “For what?”

Sighing long and loud, I stare at the wall as I whisper, “To get Jason to back off.”

“What?” he growls. “Back off what?”

Turning to him, I try to keep my mouth from trembling, but it’s impossible because my heart is breaking, and my soul is shattered.

Every part of me hurts as I say in a monotone voice, “He has videos. Of my greatest shame. And I thought maybe I could sue or something.”

There’s a pregnant pause as he dissects my words. “Your greatest shame?”

“Yes.” Inevitably the fucking tears well, and I fight them back with a frustrated sigh.

“What? That you fucked him?”

“Griffin,” I whisper, “I was so drunk that night I did things I’m not proud of, and he’s threatening to show them to…everyone.”

“To everyone…me?”

Turning away, I swipe my eyes and cross into my room, gathering my bag because I’d rather sleep on the street than this.

“Halsey, what’s on the videos?” he demands roughly.

“Sex. Me. Them! Everything,” I sniffle, my skin crawling.

Brushing past him to the bathroom, I wash my hands, and when that doesn’t work, I scrub my arms, but the feeling won’t go away. It’s all within me, and it’s everywhere.

“Halsey, what are you doing?” Griffin steps up to my back and grabs my hands, his dark eyes painting a picture I never wanted him to see.

Pulling away, I scrub harder. “It’s just, I’m dirty.”

“Shit. Hals, stop.” He grabs me up and pulls me away from the sink.

Staring at the wall blankly, I swallow but it doesn’t help the rasp, as I say, “I begged you to love me, and when you laughed in my face, I turned to Jason.”

“And?” My gaze flies to his at the feral sound that scratches at his throat.

“And”—I shrug, bowing my head—“apparently I got so drunk I begged him.”

His hands drop away from me, and turning, I look into his eyes, the irises dark with pain. “I don’t remember most of it. I think. But when I came to…”

Shuddering, I wrap my arms around my waist and glance at the sink again. Dirty.

“And what?” Griffin demands, stepping between me and the sink.

“And she said no. She said stop. She was hurting so bad…”

Pulling my chin around, he rests his forehead against mine. “She who?”

“Her,” I say, raising tearstained eyes to him. “Me. Be careful what you wish for.”

Turning away from him, I head back into the room and grab my things, shoving them in the bag with trembling fingers as he whispers in a raw voice behind me, painfully, “You said no?”

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