Page 44 of Made for Cyn

She huffs but smiles, and the tension in my chest eases because I need Iris, and when we’re fighting, my world isn’t right. Am I hurt by her actions? Yes, but I can’t change her past, which means I will have to ignore the ache in my chest at the thought of Cyn touching Iris. Not so easy to do, though, when jealousy is an ugly mass that sits heavily on my chest.

???

Later in the evening, after an awkward dinner with John, where he attempted to engage Iris in conversation, and once again, she brushed him off rudely, I’m lying in my bed, staring at the ceiling as sleep eludes me.

Although I haven’t sensed anything more with John, I’m still uneasy around him, and his friendly overtures make my skin crawl. So far, I’ve managed to avoid being alone with him, which thankfully isn’t hard to do with Iris around, but I still wish that Pam didn’t work so often away from home.

I turn onto my stomach with a heavy sigh, and my heart skips a beat when my phone buzzes on the nightstand. For a moment, I just stare. Cyn hasn’t spoken to me since the brush-off at the Point.

Although my stomach roars with a painful ache of longing, I’m hesitant to read whatever he’s sent because I’m afraid it’s not about me, just as much as I’m worried that it is.

The phone buzzes again, and I sigh because I can’t outrun him either way before picking it up with trembling fingers and opening the message.

Cyn: You have something you want to tell me?

This could be many things, and I’m not ready to tell him much of anything, including that I was with Saul when he specifically told me to stay away. Instead, I take the cowardly way out, stubbornly annoyed that he thinks he can ask about my whereabouts anyway.

Rain: ?

Cyn: Why were you at Saul’s house on Saturday?

Rain: Iris took me

Cyn: And?

Rain: And nothing. They had sex

If Cyn is truly using me to get to Iris, I hope this hits him where it counts, and I don’t feel the least bit guilty.

Cyn: And where were you when this was happening?

Rolling my eyes, I lay down on the bed and reply.

Rain: On the front porch

Rain: Why do you care anyway?

Cyn: I told you to stay away from Saul

Cyn: Maybe I do need to spank that ass

Rain: Whatever. Where were you on Saturday?

Cyn: Out

Rain: That’s it? With the slutty Shelby, perhaps?

Cyn: Your jealousy is showing . . . you know what you need to do if you want this dick

Huffing, I stare at the screen incredulously before tapping out a response and hitting send.

“Shit.” Frantically I search the phone, but I don’t see a way to retract the text. Damn. I’ve already exposed my need, and now I’m just creating more opportunities for him to use me.

Rain: How about you let me know when you’re done fucking other chicks

Cyn: I’m a dude. Fucking is what I do

Rain: You’re a dick

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