Page 61 of Made for Cyn

Chapter Ten

Cyn ices me out so completely today that I reel from the change.

After all my half-truths and lies yesterday, I escaped to my room and claimed cramps to avoid John, which ironically was the only thing I didn’t lie about. It doesn’t solve a single thing, but it’s a day away from his slimy face and my horrified feelings for the monster.

At school, I’m disheartened even though I shouldn’t be. Before, Cyn maintained his distance, but I often felt his stare and met his eyes across the room. Now, it’s like I don’t exist, and a new chick has taken my place, short-lived as it was.

This, more than anything else, confirms what I knew would happen. He wanted me for one thing, and once the challenge was gone, I was too. Maybe now I can get out of whatever he wanted regarding Iris too. There’s got to be some sort of silver lining.

Iris gives me a grim smile, commiserating in my grief, even if she doesn’t know the extent of my intimacy with Cyn, which I’m ashamed to admit. I did exactly what she said not to, and it’s my own damn fault.

The week passes in a miserable haze as I process my grief and evade John as much as possible.

Strangely, he’s been nothing but pleasant, as though beating me with a belt never happened, and that more than anything freaks me out. How do I operate around someone I can’t even get a read on?

I’m flooded with fear and a good dose of shame whenever I think about it. Iris and I have settled back into our routine, and she’s more cheerful than before, but there’s still a distance between us because of her cruelty and lies.

But I need her now more than ever, so I look past it with a grim acceptance. I’m still contemplating telling my parents, but when I finally got a chance to speak to them, John stood behind me in the kitchen the entire time, and I sweated profusely as I stumbled over my words.

When I was done, he gave me a sweet smile, patted my back, making me freeze, and said, “I’m so glad they called. I’m sure you’ve been missing them.”

I smiled weakly, resisting the urge to pull back because my skin crawled at his touch until he finally walked away. Except he whistled as he went, and I stared after him with a burning rage pressing at my chest.

Now it’s Halloween, and I’ve not had a single interaction with Cyn or Jig, not even during PE, where Jig ignored me just as completely as Cyn.

Unfortunately, Rand has taken this as a free pass to harass the shit out of me, and I try to ignore him as much as possible, but it’s not always easy.

Iris has convinced me to attend a party, which I’m dubious about because I’m completely terrified of John’s wacky moods. Still, I have zero desire to stay home alone, so I agreed halfheartedly instead.

Thankfully, we’re not dressing up because I’m in no mood for it, and besides, it’s gotten quite cold.

This time, the party is at the bridge, and there are more people than normal here when we arrive. Iris pulls a flask from her jacket pocket, and I take a swig, knowing this is going to be a long night, especially when I spy Saul lurking across the other side with a smirk on his face.

Frankly, with the John fiasco, I forgot about my issues with Saul, but they pale in comparison, especially since I haven’t had any more run-ins with him until now.

Of course, Iris takes off for him the minute we arrive, and chagrined, I glance around for something to occupy what’s sure to be a boring time. I still don’t have any friends, and I’m starting to wonder if it’s even a possibility. Between Iris’ reputation as a bitch and the Cyn fiasco, I suspect most people don’t know how to deal with me.

I spy Oscar across the way in his usual spot and step up beside him, running my eyes over the partygoers absently.

“Hey,” I say tentatively.

I know Oscar is reluctant to be around me after Cyn’s veiled threats, but I’m hoping he may have softened with the ice out from Cyn.

“Hey,” he says, pushing his glasses up his nose.

We lapse into an awkward silence, and even though it’s not entirely pleasant, I’m relieved to be out of the way and near someone I deem safe, as far as I know anyway.

“This is going to be very bad,” Oscar says, and I turn in the direction he’s looking.

Saul and a group of guys I don’t recognize, save for the one I found with the dude who was beaten and half dead, approach and mingle with the crowd.

“They’re not us?” I ask, my pulse jumping when the guy who found me spying around the house spots me and moves forward with a sleazy smile.

“No, they’re not. Why is that guy looking at you like he knows you?” Oscar asks accusingly.

Shrinking away from his censure, I lock eyes with the subject in question as he stalks toward me with a gleam in his squinty eyes.

“Remember when I said I might be in trouble?”