Page 72 of Your Two Lips
My phone rang as I was closing my door.
“Dad. Is everything okay?”
“Of course. It’s Sunday. I wanted to check in.”
“Right.” I set down my purse and sagged onto the sofa.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I was at a cookout with Finn’s family.”
“Did it not go well? You sound off.”
“No, it went fine. Wonderful. They’re so loving, and the farm has been in the family for generations. A lot of family talk. It was hard.”
“I’m sorry. I wish your mom was around to share her wisdom. Mine may be second-rate, but here it is. Finn cares for you. I would even say more than Joel did. And you care about him. You’ve been through a lot. Maybe it’s time for some joy. Give him a chance to help you find joy.”
“I want to, but I can’t face another family legacy and be found lacking. I can’t. Especially not with Finn.” It would crush me.
“Bunny, no one worthy of you would ever find you lacking. It’s Joel’s family that was lacking. Frankly, I’m glad you’re rid of him. I like the way Finn looks at you much better.”
“Thanks, Dad. And your advice is not second-rate. Mom would have said the same thing. Gray and I thought you shared a brain since you both always seemed to say the same things.”
He chuckled. “That was me deferring to your mother’s wisdom. She was a great mom.”
“She was.” The pang of her loss caused my breath to hitch. “You guys were good together.”
“We put each other first. As simple and as hard as that. Starting out, we didn’t have much. We both worked to build our dreams, but then she stepped back so I could push mine forward. I’ll never forget that. She was an incredible graphic designer.”
“I remember. She had a brilliant eye.” The memories of how my mom made so many beautiful things, our home, her clothes, the garden, the photo collages of Grayson and me growing up, and more. Things you expected to be mismatched made sense together when she finished.
“She put me first, and I put her first. That house in Perry Harbor was not my idea, but your mom wanted it, and we made it our priority. She always wanted a water view.”
I looked out my window at the silver moonlight shimmering on the channel below. “I remember her best months in those last two years were the ones we spent here.”
Dad sighed. “She was happy there. Emily, your mom, and I, we weren’t perfect. But she put me first, and I put her first, and we couldn’t fail.” He paused. “You know, Elena will never replace your mom. I will always love her.”
“Oh, I know that. Wait, did you call to tell me you're getting married or something?”
“No.” He chuckled. “No marriage plans. But when you get to be our age, you know. Plus, Washington is a community property state. If she married me, she could lose half her fortune if I turned out to be a creep.”
“Dad!”
“It’s true. If anyone’s a gold digger, it’s me.”
“I’m hanging up the phone. You’re terrible.” He wasn’t terrible. He loved her. Elena Caruso was a lucky woman.
“Emily, give the man a chance.”
My voice lowered in defeat. “He’d be giving up his chance to have a natural child with his wife, giving up the chance to see a reflection of them both in their future.”
“Emily, that’s special, but it isn’t everything. Talk to him. I know it’s scary, but that’s why you have to do it.”
“Every time I try to talk about my surgery, I can’t bring myself to do it. I start to, and then I think I’ll do it tomorrow so I can have one more night with him before.”
“Before what?”
“Before he sees me differently.” Broken. Not enough.
