Page 83 of Your Two Lips
“Thanks. You sound worse than Emily.”
“Don’t start, Carrie.” I turned back to the bar. “It wasn’t going anywhere, so I ended it.”
“What made you think it wasn’t going anywhere?”
“She wanted things to stay the same, us having fun. She didn’t want a future with me.”
Carrie took a deep breath. “What if she did, but something was holding her back?”
My head snapped to face Carrie. “What do you mean?”
“You want her no matter what?”
“Yes,” I said.
“I mean, no matter what. Her. She’s enough?”
God, yes. “Yes. What are you not telling me?”
She leaned in close, her voice low and earnest. “Emily was sick. You knew that.”
I nodded.
“I think she’s afraid.”
“Me too, but we were good together. Great. We both felt it. Why would she not even want to try?” Carrie’s face fell. My stomach did too. “Carrie, is she still sick?”
“No, no.”
Relief flowed through me.
“But …” She smoothed her hand down her belly.
“Carrie, I’m sort of losing my shit here.”
“Do you know much about the disease endometriosis?”
“Not really. She said she was okay now.”
“She is. She’s okay.” I let her words sink in. “But for some women, it’s very aggressive, even life-threatening.”
I consciously willed my heartbeat to slow back to normal. She said Emily was okay.
“For those aggressive cases, one of the most effective treatment options is a hysterectomy.”
“A what?”
“A hysterectomy, when the uterus is removed. Emily had the surgery last year. She can’t have children, Finn. That’s why she isn’t here tonight. This party would only have reminded her of what she can’t have. She thinks she can’t give you the family she knows you want. She thinks a future with her means you’d be giving up your dream.”
I just stood there. “She told you this? Why didn’t she tell me this? No, if we were real, she would have talked to me.”
“Finn, this is tough stuff. And she said her infertility was part of the reason her engagement to that dickhead ended.”
I couldn’t believe that. But then, shitbag was a world-class asshole.
“Talk to her, Finn. I don’t think I was supposed to say anything. I did it because you two are making a mistake. And if I was doing this with Dan, I would want someone to tell him. Love is too important to let secrets get in the way.”
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