Page 124 of Flawed

"Tell me what?" Pina answers.

"The only things my mom's ever told me about my dad is that he's dangerous and has the exact same birthmark as me. It's also on the same place," Zara informs her.

I squeeze my eyes shut and hold on to the corner of the stall.

She blurts out, "So I want to get a tattoo to cover it."

"But it's gorgeous and unique," Pina claims.

Zara's tone fills with hurt. She admits, "I'm tired of being reminded that I don't have a father. And every day that passes, my mom only gets more and more resolute not to tell me who he is."

Silence fills the air for a moment. Guilt consumes me.

Zara continues, "So I'm never going to know who he is. I'd rather have something covering it. Then I wouldn't have to stare in the mirror every day knowing he'll always be a stranger."

"Oh, sweetie," Pina says in a compassionate voice.

Zara chokes out, "If he's such a dangerous man, then he has to be a bad person. What does that make me?"

I hold my breath. I never knew Zara felt this way. I hate that I've done this to her. I loathe she doesn't get to know who her father is, especially when I grew up with such a loving one.

She deserves the same.

I still don't believe Luca would hurt her. But then again, I can't trust him. The Abruzzos almost killed Pina, and he did nothing to save her.

He's a monster, and I must keep reminding myself of the truth.

Pina suggests, "Maybe you could look at it as your father's not a bad person. Perhaps he's just involved in some things he shouldn't be. What if the birthmark somehow is him watching out for you?"

Zara's voice turns desperate, begging, "Aunt Pina! Do you know who he is? If you do, please just tell me. Please!"

Pina's loud sigh hits my ears. She answers, "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I don't know. Your mom's never told me anything about him. She's never told anyone, so she must have her reasons."

"I'm so tired of hearing she has her reasons," Zara utters.

"I'm sure you are. But I'm assuming it's not easy for her, either," Pina states.

"Please don't stick up for her about this," Zara asserts.

Tense silence fills the air.

Pina finally states, "Well, I hope you don't cover it up, because I love it. I think it's part of you. It makes you who you are."

"As soon as I can cover it, I am. I'll have to wait until I'm eighteen, but then I'm going to do it," she claims.

I swallow the lump in my throat.

Have I been unfair not to allow her to get a tattoo?

Why didn't she ever tell me this?

Pina orders, "Let me zip you up."

There's a shuffling sound. I wait, wondering if they can hear my guilt pounding in my pulse or my sadness weeping in my heart.

Pina exclaims, "Oh, wow! Zara! That looks amazing on you."

"I do love it," she says.

---