Page 124 of Sins of the Father

She breathes out, as if in relief, and snuggles closer. And all night, we lay like that, checking on Hope and stretching the alarm out further.

Around four a.m., Hope’s fever is gone. Harper brings the travel bassinet into the room, and we put her in it next to the bed.

I slide under the covers, and Harper follows. She rolls on top of me and hungrily kisses me, and my erection hardens.

I wish I could not respond to her, but I always do. It’s an impossible request to ask of myself. Instead of pushing her away, I slide my hands in her shorts and palm her ass.

“Don’t go to work tomorrow,” she says.

“I have to.”

“No, you don’t. Shira said you have tons of vacation days. Take a day off. It’ll give you some time to figure out how to maneuver around what happened tonight.”

And it’s another reason I’m so attracted to Harper. She’s smart and seems to understand what I need. No one has ever known how to advise me. It creates a rippling confusion of desire and sadness.

“I’ll take the day off if you don’t go back to New York.”

“Steven—”

“Please don’t put money in front of us.”

She freezes. “I’m not going to get rich. I told you, I have nothing left.”

“And I said I would take care of you.”

“You don’t get it.” She rolls off me.

I turn to her and hold her so she can’t escape me. “What don’t I get?”

“This is embarrassing for me.”

I stroke my thumb over her jaw. “I get that. Are you going to let your ego break us?”

She moves her head back. “That’s not fair.”

“Trampling on my heart is?” It’s a low blow, but it’s the truth.

“What about my heart? You don’t think this is going to kill me?”

“Then, don’t go.”

“I have to.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Shh. You’ll wake Hope.”

I lower my voice. “You’re holding all the cards.”

“Why can’t you understand how hard this is for me?”

I position my face right next to hers. “I’ve had no money and bills. And desperation makes you do stupid things. It’s why I accepted Maximillion’s help to get my job interview.”

“So, if you had nothing before, why are you giving me a guilt trip?”

“This isn’t a guilt trip. I’m fighting for you. And I’m asking you to stay in Chicago and let me support you. Figure out what you want to do and find it here, with me.”

“Steven, I’ve already spent two years soul-searching about what I want to do. I can’t just stay in la-la land, hoping I someday figure it out. And especially not on your dime.”

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