Page 119 of Wrapped in Perfection

She sobs into my chest. "It's not about love."

I hold her head to my chest and kiss her forehead. "We have nothing without love. It's everything, kotik."

She looks up. The anguish in her eyes almost kills me. "We can't have love without trust. You insisted on it."

More tears fall, and she turns away.

I tighten my arms around her, conflicted about everything I thought I needed to do, or keep from her, for us to survive the truth.

"You're hurting me by not telling me. You promised you'd never hurt me," she mumbles into my chest.

Pains shoot through my heart. I meant all the things I've said to her. When she repeats them back to me and tells me I've not held up my end of our vow to each other, I despise myself even more.

I'm a hypocrite. There are no ugly parts to Anna, but she believes there are. I don't see anything but beauty in her. But she's unveiled every aspect of her soul to me, even pieces that make her feel shameful. She's put herself in the most vulnerable position possible because I required it, but I haven't done the same.

I wanted to give her the best parts of me and hide everything else. I've been ignorant. Maybe it's why I've avoided getting close to any other women over the years. What I thought I could do with Anna isn't possible, and deep down, I know it.

But once you're involved in what weaves through my past, you can't get out. Even when you think you're out, you're still in, watching your back and waiting for the other shoe to fall.

After what happened at the restaurant tonight, there is no more denying it. There's about to be a war. And Anna witnessed the beginning.

It's ignorant for me to believe I can tell her everything is fine and not to worry about anything. She's smart. But I hate that she got a glimpse of Lorenzo Rossi.

"I have to go. I can't stay here," she whispers and tries to get off my lap.

I hold her so she can't get off me.

"Let me go."

"I don't want to ever let you go, kotik."

She shuts her eyes, and more tears fall. "Dmitri, don't make this harder for me."

"I'll tell you."

She freezes and pins her blue eyes on me. "Everything?"

My jaw twitches and I gaze up at the ceiling.

She pulls my head down.

I shake my head. "I won't tell you the little details. But you won't need to know them. The broad truth is enough for you to understand." I take my thumbs and wipe the tears off her cheeks.

Where do I even start?

Minutes pass, I focus on her suitcase.

She can't leave. I need to figure this out.

As if she can understand my anxiety, she rises and holds her hand out. "Let's get out of the closet."

I take her hand. We lie on the bed.

She cuddles into my chest.

"I've never spoken of this. I don't know where to start."

She cups my cheeks and kisses me. "Tell me. I promise I'll still love you."