Page 71 of Fake Love

I don’t know if it was Selena’s question or the hopelessness that I’m feeling at the moment, but for the first time in months, I feel like taking a hit.

I feel like reaching for the little white powder that will make me forget about all my problems and make everything better.

My mind, my heart, they need a release and no matter how many times I pat down my pockets looking for it, the release is nowhere near sight.

“Maddox!”

She’s going to freak out. Once I tell her why I called, Selena is going to freak out but if something bad happened, then she has to know.

“There was an active shooting situation happening over at the mission district. At a street festival and Jen is not fucking answering. I’m heading over there to see if I can find her.”

I hear Selena gasp and for a long minute she doesn't say anything.

After a few beats, she finally speaks. “I think I have Annaleigh’s number, I’ll try to call her. If she answers, I’ll call you back.”

“Okay.”

“Maddox,” Selena says, her voice shaking in the process. “Please. If you find out anything please call me.”

“I will.”

The call goes silent and I go back to trying to get a hold of Jen as Ben continues to maneuver his way through the San Francisco streets.

Aaron is able to get the exact location of the street festival and once we get about a block away, we come up to a closed up street. Police cars are absolutely everywhere.

My phone beeps and for a quick second I relax thinking that it’s Jen finally getting back to me, but it’s not.

A text from Selena appears on my screen telling me that Jen’s friend Annaleigh doesn't answer.

“Fuck.” I slam my phone against the dashboard, feeling frustrated and hopeless.

If only I had something that would take the hopelessness away. Even if I had a miniscule of coke, I would be fine.

I’m so focused on trying to find a way to get rid of this feeling inside of me that I don’t notice that Ben has driven over to where the police are and started talking to them, until they are right in front of me.

“Someone we know was at the festival and we’re looking for them.” Ben tells the cop.

The man in uniform nods. “A lot of people were told to go to the park three blocks over. You might be able to find them there.”

“Were there any victims?” I find myself asking, even though my throat feels as if it’s being constricted.

The cop looks at me, as if he’s debating telling me, but eventually he answers. “Two adult males. It was a targeted drive by. From what we know there are a few people injured but from the panic. If you’re looking for someone, your best bet is the park. We tried to get people there to get a few question answers, but some people went home.”

“Thank you.” I tell him.

Ben doesn’t wait for the police officer to walk away before he drives off in search of the park.

A part of me is relaxed at knowing that Jen wasn’t a victim of such a heinous crime , but I won’t fully relax until I see her with my own eyes.

Even though I know it wasn’t her, I’m still tapping at my pockets waiting for the relief to magically appear.

“There.” Aaron points out when a huge crowd of people comes into view.

There are kids, men and women everywhere, that my eyes are frantically moving left and right trying to see if I’m able to find Jen from my spot.

The answer is no.

Ben finds a spot to park and the second it stops moving, I’m out of the vehicle and running, trying to see if I’m able to find her.

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