Page 65 of The Life We Almost Had

He didn’t go on. ‘Your wife,’ I finished for him, understanding Oliver’s determination to see if something exists beyond the realms of what we already know.

‘Yes. Her passing has… Research had always been my passion but after she’d… gone I had so much time and enormous amounts of money if I’m honest. I wanted to set up my own institute. This is my… my pet project. It feels so personal. Until recently it felt so unachievable. But I’ve had a breakthrough.’

‘Tell us more about your study,’ I interrupted. I could tell Oliver was one for convoluted replies.

‘Of course.’ He led us through the final door. This room was colder, more clinical. I shuddered as I stared at the machine in the centre of it. I knew it was some sort of scanner, I’d seen them onCasualty, but never one this big. There was a flat surface for someone to lie on, which would then disappear into a large circular tube.

‘That looks like a Polo mint,’ Nell said.

She had a point – if a Polo mint was hundreds of times larger than usual and stood vertically.

‘It’s a cutting-edge fMRI – a Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging scanner that measures the blood flow to the brain as a proxy for neural activity.It’s larger and far more powerful than the standard machine. It has stronger magnets, which means a better resolution and a faster readout. The visual cortical activity it measures will be decoded to provide a layered image that will reproduce a reconstruction of …’

‘Whoosh.’

Oliver trailed off as Nell ran the flat of her hand over her head in a ‘you’ve lost me’ motion.

‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘Basically, scientists have created a way to extract information from different levels of the brain’s visual system and algorithms to interpret and reproduce any imagined images. With clinical trials so far – the work of Yukiyasu Kamitani, for example – the images are fed back via a computer and can then be viewed via the console room over there.’ He pointed to a small window, another room beyond it. ‘With the new tech in the fMRI scanner I mentioned before, I believe we will be able to see not just still images, but… I suppose the easiest way to describe it would be like watching a movie.’

‘So I can see on a screen what Adam is thinking?’ I was incredulous.

‘Potentially, yes.’

‘You keep saying potentially or in theory or possibly.’

Oliver pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. I wondered why, with all of his money, he didn’t buy a pair that fit. ‘I don’t want to promise you something that I can’t deliver. What Icantell you is that early indications are really positive but we’ve been lacking a test subject…’ He noticed the way I clamped my lips together to prevent myself furiously telling him Adam wasnota test subject. Oliver had been so open about his lack of social graces and I knew he didn’t mean any harm.

‘I’ve done it again, haven’t I? Sorry. I don’t usually work with people.’

‘It’s a lot to take in,’ Nell said. ‘The concept that we can see on a screen—’

‘There’s more,’ Oliver cut in. ‘It should also be possible for someone – me in this case – to wear fMRI compatible VR goggles which, in theory, could incorporate any senses Adam might be experiencing. I don’t want to be viewing the results solely through a computer.’

‘Our friend, Josh, has one of those Occulus Quest VR gaming headsets,’ Nell said. ‘I had a go. It was so immersive. So real. As though you’re somewhere else. Is this similar?’

‘It’s so much more than that with the addition of sense recognition. Machines are artificially intelligent; they can’t pick up on the nuances, what a person is feeling. By connecting to Adam’s consciousness with the addition of these goggles, I can really absorb myself in Adam’s mind – if there’s anything going on, of course. I’ll be able to experience—’

Taste, touch, feel.

Know.

It was all too much.

I sank heavily onto the armchair, trying to imagine Adam here. My things in the next room.

‘Do you have to be in the scanner too?’ I asked. ‘Could Adam merge with—’

‘God no. It’s nothing like that.’

‘I’ve seenThe Flyand—’

‘There’s absolutely no danger of anyone’s teeth falling out or them growing wings.’

‘But… will Adam…’ My questions clogged my throat. There were so many things I wanted to ask,but I was almost afraid of the answers. ‘Is… is it dangerous?’

Oliver fell silent.

‘Is it?’ I probed.

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