Page 80 of The Art of Loving You

‘He’ll be fine. I’ll take him to the cinema. We both want to see the new Marvel film. We can go for a pizza after.’

‘That’s so kind of you.’

‘Not really. He’s like a little brother to me. Anannoyinglittle brother at times but he’s a good kid.’

‘I guess it must feel odd? No, that’s the wrong word. But growing up with a sibling and then becoming an only child.’

‘Liam isn’t a replacement for Bethany.’

‘No. Of course not. Just it’s nice for Liam to have a role model and…’ I didn’t quite know how to finish. Had I said the wrong thing?

For a moment we were quiet. Noah took a step towards me but still we didn’t speak.

‘I suppose I’m coming to think of us as a family,’ I said eventually.

‘A dysfunctional one,’ Noah said, but his tone was light. ‘I really enjoyed yesterday.’

‘Me too. Even if I did need to duck every time Sid took his turn, just in case.’

We both laughed but then he was suddenly serious.

‘Libby.’ His eyes met mine but I didn’t understand what they were expressing that he couldn’t say.

But the way he looked at me …

In my head I could hear the music from yesterday, the intensity of our dance.

It didn’t mean anything.

A shiver snaked down my spine. ‘Libby,’ he said again, softly. He moved closer, gently smoothed my hair away from my face. I could feel his warm breath against my skin, my lips. My heart galloped with a fear he was about to ruin everything by trying to kiss me.

He wouldn’t try to kiss me, would he?

I couldn’t move. I didn’t want him but his palm felt soft against my cheek. I placed my hand upon it. I’d missed being touched.

Touching someone.

‘Libby?’ We sprang apart at Alice’s voice, my heart pounding, cheeks burning as if we’d done something wrong. ‘Liam said you were up here. Oh, hello, Noah.’

‘Alice. You haven’t seen this room finished, have you? Do you like it?’

‘It’s amazing!’

‘I’ve got to go. I’ll see you in a week.’ Noah slipped away before I could speak. Flustered I turned my attention to my sister who was rocking in the chair I’d bought, gazing out over the fields.

‘It’s so peaceful here,’ she said.

‘Well this room is yours. Yours and the baby’s whenever you want to stay.’

‘You’ll love her, won’t you? Whatever?’

‘Alice, of course I’ll love her. I can’t wait to be an auntie and what’s all this “whatever”? Your midwife isn’t concerned about anything is she?’ Up until now all the appointments had gone well.

‘No, it’s just … promise me you’ll never judge her.’

‘Alice, you’re worrying me.’

She lifted her hair from her neck before letting it drop. ‘Ignore me, I’m sweltering. Being pregnant in August isn’t fun. How can it be this hot before midday?’

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