Page 35 of From Now On

He just doesn’t know and it isn’t fair to use his siblings as an excuse. To let them think he wants them if it’s solely because he may not want… this.

At the airport Sasha chatters away excitedly about the experiences they can share, catching a show on Broadway, catching a cab.

‘They’ll be bright yellow like in the movies.’

She talks about anything and everything except for the children.

‘Anyway, it’s nearly time! I’ll just nip to the loo.’ She kisses him before she leaves. Her lips are dry.

It’s a relief when she’s gone. Charlie’s head throbs but he knows it isn’t really her voice, or the sound of the suitcases being dragged along on wheels or the frequent announcements of the Tannoy that’s causing him pain.

A tinny voice declares that their gate is open for boarding.

He takes out his mobile to switch it onto airplane mode so he doesn’t forget later. There’s a message alert.

Pippa has texted him a photo. He studies it; it takes a second for him to realize what it is.

What it means.

In an instant everything has changed, again.

Chapter Sixteen

Nina

Milk splatters over the table as Nina plunges her spoon into her bowl, her cornflakes sinking under the force.

‘Don’t play with your food,’ Aunt Violet snaps.

‘I’ve told you, like, a million times, I don’t eat breakfast,’you silly cow, Nina adds, but only in her head. ‘Mum never made—’

‘Your mum never made you do a lot of things, letting you run wild.’

‘Not forcing me to eat cereal I don’t actually want isn’t actually letting me run wild,’ Nina says.

‘It’s the most important meal of the day.’

‘Whatever. Gotta go or I’ll be late. It takes me longer to get to school from here.’

‘Yes, you’ve mentioned that.’ Aunt Violet turns towards the sink and Nina thinks she hears her mutter ‘a million times’ but she isn’t sure. ‘Duke, go with your sister. It’s vital I’m at work a little earlier for a critical meeting.’

Nina rolls her eyes. You’d think Aunt Violet was a solicitor not a legal secretary the way she makes out her job to be so important; she probably only makes the tea and hands out biscuits.Still, she knows Aunt Violet’s boss, David, helped her with all the ‘Missing Presumed Dead’ forms, which will allow her to control… everything.

But not her; Nina will not be controlled.

She watches as her aunt lifts her hair off of her neck and clips it into place. Perhaps she fancies David. Hopes he’ll slip off the glasses she wears for reading and let down her hair and say, ‘Why Violet, you’re beautiful,’ except Aunt Violet isn’t. She’s ugly on the inside and that shows on the outside.

Nina doubts her aunt has ever been in love in her life, not like she is. Nina feels the buzz of excitement, which quickly fizzles out when she remembers her parents have gone and she shouldn’t be feeling all the things she’s feeling, a desperate need to be touched, kissed.

‘Come on, squirt,’ she says to Duke and they leave the house that does not in the month that they have been here, will never, feel like home.

On the corner, Nina balances her rucksack on a garden wall and unzips it, pulling out her make-up bag. She opens the camera app on her phone and switches it to selfie mode.

‘Hold it still,’ she instructs Duke as she uses the screen as a mirror, sweeping black mascara over her lashes, painting her lips caramel. She could have done this in her bedroom; it’s not like she’s scared of Aunt Violet or anything, but it’s less hassle this way and, besides, she is used to it. Mum never liked her wearing make-up either but then a lot has changed in the few weeks since Mum was here.

‘My arm aches,’ Duke complains.

‘That’s because you haven’t got any muscles,’ Nina says.

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