Page 18 of Falling for the Enemy

Surgery was in my future in a couple of days, so I figured that would be a good time to start.

* * *

The next fewdays that we were in the hospital together, I learned more about Amber than I probably had any other soul. I was always moving, never really talking about feelings or anything like that. Amber was not the same.

I realized that she was what I wanted. I also realized that I wanted her to really know me. I put on a front and was rude most of the time to keep people away. It wasn't because I hated people, it was just people were complicated, and it was easier not to get close to them. It would have certainly been easier to keep my distance from Amber, but after spending so much time together in that hospital room, laughing and joking with her, learning the secrets of her past that shaped her into the person she was, I realized that not knowing her was far worse than any complication that came with the latter.

I was quite surprised to find out that Amber was actually divorced. I never really thought about it, was convinced that she was feeling love for the first time, but I had to recognize that maybe she wasn't. Of course, she loved her husband. I knew it was strange to think, but I was jealous that I didn't get to be her first and always. And then I realized I was really getting ahead of myself. I had no idea if she was even feeling the same way I was. I took that part for granted, never having a problem convincing a woman to give me a chance. Those women hadn't been like Amber though.

It was strange to say and actually mean it, but I almost didn’t want to leave the hospital. It meant that Amber would go back into her house and me to mine. I didn’t want to lose the closeness that we had gained. I asked her if she wanted me to give her a ride home and she kind of laughed. “I don't think your car is going to make it, Frank,” she commented with a smile.

I hadn't even thought about it. My vehicle was probably dragged out of the embankment, but I doubted that it was going to be drivable. I really hadn't thought things through and somehow Amber had. She offered to give me a ride and said something about how she was probably a better driver. I, of course, didn't agree, but I was going to let it go.

It made me feel like I was in a pressure cooker. I only had so much time to talk to her and then my chances were going to be gone. I wanted to ask her to do something wild and crazy. I hoped that she would. I wasn't ready to say goodbye just yet. I had high hopes for the drive home when I was going to ask her out on an actual date, make my feelings known to her.

I was going to do all those things, but twenty minutes later she pulled up in front of her house and I had made a few comments as we drove, but that was it. I was feeling like a failure. I didn't know why, but making that move on Amber did not come as easily as it should have.

I wanted her, desperately, so why did it have to be so complicated?

Amber looked over at me and said that she was probably going to miss work the next day. I agreed since we both were out of the hospital but still not feeling all that great.

I was about to get out, feeling defeat, when I noticed that Amber hadn’t moved to open her door either. I took that as a sign, not even sure if it was a sign or not. I wanted it to be, so I made it one. I brushed my lips softly against hers. It was just like I remembered when I kissed the angel. I realized now that it was Amber the whole time, but I’d dreamed about the angel as much as I dreamed about her.

Her lips were incredibly soft, and she didn't pull away, at least not at first. For a man that had always had good luck with women, I wanted it to be much like the times I had kissed others. I wanted her to swoon, beg me for more like all the rest, but like everything else that was Amber, she wasn’t ready to do just that.

We got out of the vehicle, and I didn’t get invited inside. That was a crushing blow to my ego, but also to me personally. I needed her so badly and walking away after all the time we’d spent together was going to be weird and hard. I had never been so wrong before.

Amber looked at me strangely and started walking to her place. I watched her go, willing her to turn around and look at me, but she didn’t. She didn’t look back, not once. I didn’t want to, but that felt like a sign as well.

17

Amber

As soon as I got inside, I leaned up against the back of the door, trying to get my heart to calm down. When Frank’s lips had touched mine, I knew that he was all that I was ever going to need. The feeling rushed over me like a brush fire, setting every inch of me on fire. It was the sort of feeling that I knew was going to make it so I never felt the same again.

It was exactly what I had been waiting for him to do and he was damn good at it. I was touching my lips, still feeling him. For whatever reason, I could swear that my lips were still heated, like he had somehow burned them with his passion.

I finally pulled myself together and the next thing I knew, there was another knock at the door. I had just left; I did not expect to see him when I opened it. I certainly didn't expect him to pull me into his arms almost immediately and start to kiss me. That was not on my radar, and it was even more passionate than the first time. As much as I tried to fight the feeling travelling up my body, I quickly realized that it was impossible to do.

He had me pressed hard against his chest and I could feel every muscle that I had seen. Frank felt as good as he looked, which was saying something.

Next thing I knew, Frank was pushing me into my house and he wasn’t slowing down. The whole time I’m moving, his lips and hands are on me. I didn’t know how we were moving as one, but we were. He let me go, dazed, confused, and turned-on. It happened so fast, my head was still spinning. I thought we had this unwritten rule between us that we weren’t going to move further than we had. He was breaking that rule.

“What are you doing, Frank?” I asked.

He grinned and didn’t seem to feel bad about what he had done at all.

“Something that I think both of us have been dying to do since we met.”

While it was true that I had wanted to do that since we met, my insides were quivering with the sound of his voice. I was also scared out of my mind. This was happening too fast. Frank scared me, the way I felt about him freaked me out. While he made me feel safe and whole when I was with him, notably a pretty good feeling, what happened next really made me worry. I was terrified of how I would feel with anymore touching from him. How would I be able to focus, when his focus was on me?

“Are you going to tell me that you don’t want this?” Frank asked with an answer already in his expression.

“I am not saying that at all.” As soon as I said it, Frank moved closer, his hands back on me. His lips were so close, but he didn’t lean down the last little way to kiss me. He just dangled the kiss there, making me want to beg for it, while another part of me refused to show that sort of need to anyone.

“What do you want, Amber?” Frank towered over me, his fingers spanning my waist and playing softly with the flesh on my middle. I could feel goosebumps taking over everything and before I knew it, my body was visibly shivering.

I sighed. “I don’t know, you break all of the rules.”

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