Page 92 of The Confidant
It was like he was getting payback for the time I told our house dad that Asher wasn’t in our room one night because he had diarrhea.
My face was just turning beet red when Elyse grabbed Asher’s arm and tugged him away, saying, “You need to go to bed before you say anything else, Mister.”
Asher just laughed but let Elyse lead him toward the school entrance.
Once their image disappeared from the rearview mirrors, I let out a long sigh and said, “Asher seems to be in a really good mood tonight.”
Scarlett smiled, thankfully seeming to find my roommate’s antics more funny than annoying. “He definitely seems excited that we’re talking again, at least.”
“That he does.”
We were both quiet for a moment, like we were trying to remember what we’d been talking about before the interruption.
Her phone dinged. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was Asher trying to rile us up even more with some nonsense. But Scarlett groaned and leaned back against the headrest. “These emails are starting to get overwhelming.”
“What emails?”
“All theDear Elizaones.” She showed me her phone screen. “I literally get, like, ten emails a day, which I’m sure is way less than whatThe Confidantgets, but there are so many that it feels like all I do during my free time is look through emails when I should be studying.” She shook her head. “I thought once basketball was over I’d be able to fit it in better. But with all the school stuff and figuring out college stuff and trying to beat Carter and Elyse for valedictorian…it’s just not panning out.”
“It is a lot,” I said, thinking about all the emails I had waiting inThe Confidant’s inbox right now.
She narrowed her eyes. For an anxiety-filled moment, I worried she was going to call me out on beingThe Confidant, but then she said, “Do you think this is part of Asher’s evil plan to make sure Elyse wins valedictorian?”
“Part of Asher’s plan?” I frowned, wondering what these emails would have to do with Asher.
“I don’t know.” She shrugged. “Like, maybe he figured out I’mDear Elizaand he decided to make a bunch of spam email accounts to send me random questions just to keep me distracted. He did say that he wanted to help Elyse win.”
“I really don’t think he’d do that.” I laughed. “I don’t think either he or Elyse arethatcutthroat about her getting valedictorian.” If any of my friends was going to be cutthroat about it, it was Scarlett. She was the most competitive of everyone.
“You’re probably right.” She slipped her phone into her back pocket. “Maybe I should just shut the column down. I feel bad getting all these emails and not really having the time to give the column the focus that it probably needs.”
“You could do that,” I said. “Or, if you wanted, I could help you with it.”
“You could?” she asked, her voice sounding hopeful. And it was probably a good thing that she didn’t know just how much I would be willing to do to make her happy. “Do you think you’ll have enough time? Because we have most of the same classes, so you’re probably just as busy as me.”
“Now that basketball is over, I have a few extra hours in my week,” I said. “Plus, I have time before school that you don’t have.”
“Oh… right…” Her expression fell a little. “I guess not having Bible study every morning or church on Sundays freed up some time.”
“The church did keep me busy, and so yes, I’ve had a few extra hours freed up that I can fill in other ways that are meaningful to me.”
“It’s not all a chore,” Scarlett said, her tone defensive. “I mean, I know some people find the lessons boring or get overwhelmed with everything we’re supposed to do. But there is a lot of good that comes from it, too. There’s a lot of peace that comes from the gospel.”
“I know,” I hurried to say, not wanting the truce we’d reached tonight to suddenly disappear because I’d offended her. “I know a lot of people love it and that’s great. I was just saying thatIcan use that time differently now. I can use it in ways that mean more tomespecifically.”
I watched her cautiously, not sure how she would accept my next words since for so long, spirituality had been defined by my religion more than being catered specifically to me. But it was important for me to be more authentic than I’d been previously.
I added, “Something that means a lot to me and helps fill my spiritual bucket is writing and also trying to help people. So helping with some of theDear Elizastuff really isn’t a problem since I enjoy it. And knowing I’m helping my best friend out is an added bonus.” I searched her eyes. “Supporting you in accomplishing your goals and dreams is important to me.”
“You care about my goals and dreams?” she asked, like she wasn’t sure she believed me.
“Of course.” I took her hand in mine again. “I know you might feel differently about me now. But I still care about you and want you to have all the good things in life.”
She intertwined her fingers with mine. Looking at me through her lashes, she said, “I want you to have all the good things, too.”
I wanted to say more, to tell her that I wanted so much more than that.
That I still wantedher.
