Page 42 of Scaled Hearts

I have no idea what he’s talking about, so I ignore him. He sounds strained, but I can’t make myself care enough to push my emotions onto the back burner and become his support system right now.

It’s not going to happen. Not this time. Right now I need to be selfish.

Tears fall down my cheeks while I hold back a sob. It’s not that I want to break down in front of him, I just have no choice. Once I become overwhelmed like this, I can’t stop. I can only ride through the waves of grief and hope that I make it out on the other side.

“Kelly. Stop it.”

I shake my head at him.Just leave me alone, is what I want to plead to him. If he wants, he can leave me here and come back later. I don’t care.

I hiccup and slowly sink down into a crouch. My forehead comes to rest on my knees while I balance back on the balls of my feet.

I want all of this to end. The fighting, the bickering, the coldness towards me. I want things to go back to the way they were when we were in his cave and I could let myself be lost in him for a time.

I’ve never had that feeling before. It makes me long for things that I’m not sure I will ever be able to experience again.

A hiccup leaves my lips again, causing my entire body to tremble.

“Kelly, if you don’t get up right now, so help me, I will end you.”

There’s a bite to his voice that isn’t very genuine. Which is kind of ironic in a sense. I never thought that Angurus, of all people, would feel uncomfortable in the presence of someone crying.

My hands slide out of my hair. I wrap my arms around my knees and hold myself together that way. I hope that I don’t completely shatter because I’m not sure if Angurus will be kind enough to pick up the pieces.

“Kelly…?” His voice is softer now.

A small sob escapes me. I wish someone would hold me and tell me that everything is alright. Or tell me that the weight of the world didn’t have to rest on my shoulders.

I wish… I wish…

I don’t know what for anymore.

19

Angurus

Ipush my hand harder against my chest.

It’s so hard to breathe through this unbearable and agonizing pain.

Our bond throbs inside of me. Kelly’s life line cutting me and bleeding me dry until I don’t know what else to do but drop down to my knees in front of her.

I drag in haggard breaths while I listen to the sounds of her quiet sobbing echo around the quiet chamber. I’ve never heard a human sound so forlorn before. It was as if she’d suffered a great loss and was now only coming to terms with it.

Had her parents made that much of an impact on her that she moured them this deeply?

I can barely remember my past as a dark elf let alone the ones who created and sired me. Dark elves aren’t particularly partial to being maternal or paternal to their off-spring. As soon as we are old enough to be left on our own without dying, we are.

It is never for any insidious reasons. We are simply not the type of creatures to put value in child-rearing other than to carry on familiar bloodlines.

Not much has changed now that I’m a different species. Most of the child-rearing is left up to the mothers who are treated very well. Being that there were so few of them that could carry on our species, they were well taken care of.

But that doesn’t mean that they were overly nurturing.

Dragons live in a competitive and harsh environment. The moment we are able to fly and be independent without needing to suckle from our mother’s breast, we left.

Though, here Kelly sat, crying over the death of her caretakers like it was only yesterday. How deeply do human emotions run? Because I feel like I’m drowning in them—choking on the bitter taste of regret and sorrow.

I’ve never experienced such deeply disturbing emotions in my life.

---