Page 24 of Blood Lord

I tuck her in closer, wrapping my arms around her shoulders and resting my chin on top of her head. Sighing softly, I close my eyes, inhaling her scent, and it stirs my soul.

I've never loved before—or at least, I don't remember ever having done so. Maybe I thought I was in love once, when I was human, but I was so young. I didn't understand the world then.

I honestly thought once I was Made that I never could love. Love felt too relative to me, something that humans enjoyed because it was limited. Their short lifespans only allowed for so much emotion, so they didn't understand that it would fade.

Yet, here I am, proving my own theories wrong. Love isn't about the length of time that has elapsed; it is just about meeting the right person.

And as Selene's scent fills me, seeming to fuel my body more than the air I breathe or blood in my veins, I know that I have. I would do anything for her; I would kill anyone who would dare to talk to her the wrong way—that much I have proved. But I would give my own life for her if I needed to. There isn't a scenario in this world where I would choose anything over her.

And that floods me with anxiety, another emotion so long forgotten it's taken me a day to even place the word. My feelings for her have greatly complicated both of our lives, and I fear for what is to come.

"I want to stay here with you," I whisper into her hair with my eyes still closed. "Forever. I'd never leave this cave if I didn't have to, and I'd be happier than I have been in my entire life." I laugh softly, as if she can hear me. "That's two and half millenium, and you've managed to be better than every second of that."

My stomach twists painfully as I say it, though. I know that I can't hide here forever. The Council is expecting me back in a few days now, and if I don't report back, they will come looking for me. They'd kill Selene as my punishment, to remind me that I can lose everything and never achieve the one thing I want: death.

I'm confident that I've gathered enough information to scrape by. I know there are humans on the surface, used as toys by the dark elves. I know that only some dark elves remember us, and while they seem to be a little more skilled than they used to be, they are no match for us still. And according to Selene, they rarely war as we once did, so they will not stand a chance against an invasion.

But more than anything, I've learned that there is more to life than lying in underground caves waiting for the planet to cave in on me. And I feel that is more invaluable than anything I could share with the Council.

Make her one.

Again, the thought bursts through my thoughts, unbidden, and instead of shoving it away, I entertain it for a moment. I imagine what Selene would look like with pale lips and dark shadows beneath her eyes and her pale skin even more icy.

And it breaks my heart.

I know that it would greatly ease our circumstances, but I could never do that to her. She is absolutely perfect the way she is, and I could never rob her of her humanity. I never had that choice, and I think, especially knowing what I do now, I wouldn't have picked this life.

Selene doesn't even know the full truth about me.

I've told her half-truths, so I could never Change her when she doesn't even know what she'd really become. Though I believe she won't find an endless life a death sentence with me at her side, I cannot make that decision for her.

As much as I want to spend all of eternity with her, I will never put my happiness over hers. It is her choice, and I don't know if she'd pick it. What's worse is I don't know if she will survive it.

Not everyone is successfully Changed. In fact, it's only about three quarters, maybe even a little less, that become vrakken. The rest burn with our venom until their heart stops, already too weak from being used as a blood bag.

How could I ever do that to her?

Selene stirs in my arms, and it pulls me from my thoughts. I push them away as I release my hold on her, and she yawns softly, swiping at her face as she rolls back. Raising her arms, she stretches out, and I am so caught up in taking in her body as she flexes that I don't realize she's staring at me until a soft laugh escapes her lips.

My eyes snap up to her, and a smile spreads across my face. "Good morning."

She twists to see the daylight breaking into the cave. "Oh, wow. I slept for a while."

I nuzzle against the side of her face. "I think I wore you out."

"Not that I mind." Her arms wind around the back of my neck, and she pulls me over for a kiss.

When I pull back, I'm breathless as I stare into her striking eyes, but then I start to notice the shadows beneath them. In fact, her pale skin seems to be taking on a gray hue, and I realize how long it has been since she's gone out in the sun.

Pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose, I tell her, "I'll be right back."

She props up on her elbows, watching me as I dress quickly, rushing outside to take more of the dark elves' rations. I bring them back to her, along with the stack of clothes she had abandoned the afternoon before, and I'm grinning wildly as she sits up and takes it all from me.

"Hurry," I say as she stares at the clothes and then back up at me.

"Why?" There's a hint of fear in her eyes. "Where are we going?"

I crouch down, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. "We're going to seerealmagic."

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