Page 84 of Forever Fascinating

He waited silently.

“When you build a friendship, a relationship with someone, you accept them for who they are… regardless of the quirks, irritations, and annoyances, because we all have them,” she smiled knowingly, closing her eyes for a moment to gather her thoughts. “But when youtrulyaccept them, you begin realizing just how beautiful a soul they are? The crucible that shaped them, you are grateful for it, because that person came out stronger with values that make them perfect… andthatis when you discover that it’s something more.”

She drew in a shaky breath, turning towards him and unable to look away from his eyes as he watched her, his own eyes shiny with emotion, nearly mirroring hers.

“I’m here… forever…” she whispered, staring at him. “I want to be your support, your stability, and treasure the fact that you are scared to get hurt by me – but know that I willneverhurt you, ever.”

“But what if I hurt you someday?” he asked thickly. “What if ‘nature versus nurture’ is too strong? What if my genetics will mean that I turn into some jerk that runs away the moment things get tough, or lets you down because I’m not the guy you need… because what if I can’t be physically - because of my past?”

“Because you even said that tells me you are the guy I need,” she whispered, laying her hand against his cheek tenderly. “If you turn into some jerk and run away, just know that I’m crazy enough to chase you down…”

Both choked out a tearful laugh, smiling at each other.

“Let’s make the trip to Iceland short. You can do your polar plunge, we’ll visit the Blue Lagoon or Diamond Beach, and indulge in whatever insanity this is between us… and then I want us to spend time in Boston together. I want for us to meet each other’s families, and show you where you will always be welcomed,” she urged, unable to look away from his brilliant gaze as she spoke openly.

“Home,” she beckoned softly, inviting him into her world, her life. “My home… where I will wait forever for you.”

“Oh Jana,” he whispered tearfully, as if he couldn’t hold back anymore what was inside of him, drawing her into his arms. “I love you so much and I’m so scared that someday you’ll get sick of me.”

She closed her eyes against him, treasuring his words and the feeling she heard behind them.

“How can I?” she uttered, not caring if she was crying anymore or not as the tears fell. “I love you and I know we are supposed to be taking things slow, getting to know each other, but I’ve never felt something so miraculous and so right.”

He choked out a sob and she held him tightly, giving him a few moments to compose himself.

“Were you just saying that because I said it? You really love me?” he said thickly. “Are you sure? I can be a real nitwit sometimes.”

She laughed tearfully, nodding against his shoulder.

“Me too,” she admitted, smiling. “I can too. Apparently, I thrive on this insane love, because it makes me do crazy, unimaginable things.”

This time he laughed, looking at her, his tawny lashes spiky, as she brushed away a tear from his cheek. He smiled at her tenderly, his eyes still full of emotion… but that fear lingered deep in those depths.

“We arenotcrying like babies on vacation in some ancient church, okay?” he said, embarrassed and smiling, placing a soft kiss on her lips. “And what kind of crazy unimaginable things?”

“You can’t freak out on me,” she warned nervously, feeling suddenly anxious and keenly aware that her beloved, yet skittish, man might actually bolt.

Instead of taking anyone else’s advice?

Jana was going with her gut feelings, pulling out the small bag she’d purchased in the gift shop.

“What’s that?”

“An impulsive and insane idea that hit me,” she replied, opening the bag. It crinkled loudly, almost to the point it was making her jump, as she reached inside. “I don’t want you reading too much into this or freaking out, but it hit me that I wanted something to mark this.”

Distracted, she pulled it out and hid it behind her, looking at him.

“I’m in, Matthew,” she repeated, looking at him. “The thought of anyone else hitting on me, asking me out, or even looking at me is alarming and unsettling… and no, I’m not being arrogant or snooty. There are some real dogs out there…”

She rolled her eyes, smiling at him… and he didn’t smile.

“Some would say you are sitting with one of those ‘dogs’ right now,” he countered in a pained voice, causing her to shake her head negatively in reaction.

“Nope,” she continued, unfazed. “But it got me to thinking that I don’t want anyone hitting on you, talking to you, or ogling my guy either. I’m possessive.”

“Did I mention that where I’m stationed… it’s mostly guys?”

They both gave a weak laugh.

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