Page 80 of Heart Set on You

My heart is aching more than I thought possible.

I just spent the best two months of my life with a woman who is incredible in every way. She’s smart, courageous and genuine, and she has a heart as big as the sky. Most importantly, she saw me for me. She walked into my life and stole my heart. The only woman I have ever loved. No one has ever come close to making me feel the way she has. No one. Ever. And she’s gone.

Rylee boarded a flight to Nashville today while I was stuck in my meeting – a meeting I would have cancelled without a second thought if it meant I could have more time with her. But she wouldn’t hear of it.

Instead, I’m standing in front of the refrigerator looking for something to eat. Nothing looks appealing, so I grab a beer and an apple and flop myself down on the sofa. I turn my gaze to the clock on the wall for the 50th time in the last half hour, waiting for it to be 8:30 p.m. That’s when Rylee’s flight lands, which means that’s when I can call her. Fantastic. I’ve turned into one of those guys who can’t live a day without his girlfriend. I’ve officially hit a new level of pathetic.

I stretch out on the couch, wishing Rylee was sliding in next to me. I turn on the television hoping for a distraction and flip through the channels, stopping at a sitcom I’ve been hearing about. In the scene, the two main characters are on a date. I watch as they hold hands and walk down the street. And all I can think of is Rylee. And as ridiculous as it is, it pisses me off. I’m envious over two actors in a fake dating scene. I flick the TV off. I’ve absolutely lost my mind.

In need of a distraction, I pick up my phone and search for a podcast. I scroll through at least a dozen before deciding I hate them all. I also hate everything about this house without Rylee in it. It’s too quiet without the sound of her voice. It feels empty without the scent of her body lotion, without her camera on the kitchen counter or the pair of sandals she’d always leave just inside the patio door.

With a dull ache in my chest, I push up from the sofa and dial my brother Liam’s number. He answers on the second ring.

“Miles. What’s up?”

“Not much, man. How ya doing? How’s Ellie?” I ask, walking over to the windows that leads to the yard.

“No baby yet, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“I’d be pretty pissed if there was one and this was how I was finding out,” I say. “How’s Mom and Dad?”

“They’re good. Dad’s been busy at the office working out the logistics to get Parker moved back home. I think he’s found a replacement for him out in Cape May and a new position for Parks in Reed Point. He’s keeping it all under wraps, though. And mom, well… she’s freaking out that we don’t know what the sex of the baby is. She wanted to have one of those stupid gender reveal parties.”

“Why am I not surprised?”

“How’s Rylee?” Liam asks, and I realize that he doesn’t know about her heading home.

“I guess I haven’t told you. She’s gone. She went back to Tennessee.” So much for not thinking about Rylee. I think I made it all of two and a half minutes.

Memories of us together flash through my mind like a slideshow. The way she tilts her neck to the side so I can kiss her favorite spot under her ear. The freckles across the bridge of her nose. When she said she could never be with anyone else after I told her I was falling for her.

“And you let her?” My brother interrupts my thoughts.

“What the fuck was I supposed to do, Liam? That was always her plan. She wants to take care of her grandparents.”

“Is that what she really wants?”

I’m pacing the floor. It’s a habit when I’m agitated.

“What do you mean? Of course it is.” I picture Rylee sitting right this second on the plane that’s taking her back home. Is she excited? Or is she sad because she misses me too? Does it make me a horrible person that I hope she’s as miserable as me? Shut the fuck up, Miles. You don’t really mean that.

“Huh. I didn’t think you were that dense,” Liam says.

“And I didn’t call you so you could make an already bad day worse.”

Liam clears his throat. “Wasn’t my intention. Look, just make sure you’ve thought about this from all sides. Maybe there’s another way. I know what she means to you.”

It’s quiet for a moment while I let his words sink in. There has got to be a way for us to be together. I drag my hand over my face, trying again to shake the images of her from my mind.

After I say goodbye to Liam, I strip down to my briefs and crawl into bed. I’m tempted to text Rylee, but it’s pointless. She’s at least an hour from her plane landing. Instead, I scroll through our old texts, reading and re-reading our last string of messages.

I lock my screen and let my phone fall to the mattress. I’ve officially made it eight hours without her. How the hell am I expected to make long distance work?

Saying goodbye is fucking hard.

I fell in love with her.

Now I have to figure out a way to live life without her.

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