Page 79 of Naive in Love

"Bu—"

I cut him off. "I couldn't believe because I doubted myself. I doubted you because I didn't believe in me. The past couple of weeks have, in a sense, been a journey of self-discovery. I know I’m an introvert, but it's more than that. I guess some of my insecurities have come from having Bree and Paige as best friends. I always thought guys talked to me when they couldn’t get their attention. They are the ‘typical beauties.’” I air-quote with my fingers.

“Did you not hear anything I told you? You attract your own attention with no help from anyone else.” I place my hand on his chest to stop him.

“I did hear you, but at the time, I didn’t believe it. I was so confused. Caleb had me thinking in crazy circles. He was controlling me, but more importantly, I let him. Without realizing it though. In a weird way, I thought he was the real deal because he chose me when I wasn’t with the girls. Then when you said you were taking yourself out of the picture, I thought what you said at the beach was just the alcohol talking.”

“How co—” he attempts to interject, but I continue.

“There is just so much to try and explain. I will tell everything if you want to hear it, but right now what I need you to know is I’ve fallen for you. Fallen hard. Caleb has nothing to do with this except that it took him cheating for me to finally start seeing everything more clearly. And for the record, when you walked away, it hurt so much worse than finding him in bed with someone else. With Caleb, I was embarrassed and mad at myself. But when I lost you,” I pause and take a breath. “I felt empty. That’s when the pieces began to slip into place. Lena told me to go to you. To tell you I was hurting, but I couldn’t because I would’ve been completely humiliated if you sent me away because you didn’t feel the same or because you’d changed you mind. That’s why I didn’t chase you. I was scared.”

He stays in the same position, unmoving. The knots of nerves tighten, and I take a drink, waiting for him to respond. Something. Anything. I need him to talk. Let me know how he feels, what he’s thinking.

Just as I’m beginning to think I risked it all too late and wishing for my friends to arrive so they can take me home, he says, “So you like me? You really like me.”

My stomach instantly relaxes, and I answer, “Yes.” I nod my head enthusiastically. “So much. I’m not too late?”

He takes the beer out of my hand and places both our bottles on the end table closest to him, then reaches out to me with open arms. As soon as I see my invitation, I scramble to him, wrapping my arms around his neck and holding tightly. I sit back to look at him.

"That day at lunch, why did you walk away?" His features take a sorrowful turn.

"I was scared too." He takes a deep breath, pulling back and dropping his gaze to his lap. "You have to understand, I haven't had a relationship with any of the girls I've been with." He looks up at me again before continuing, "I didn't believe in ‘love’…” He air-quotes with his fingers. “…because of my parents and their fucked-up marriage. And I didn't trust girls after what happened with…” The sadness in his voice guts me. "So when you were unsure about him and me…I got spooked. It looked like you had doubts because you couldn’t decide. You had to be one hundred percent sure I was who you wanted. I didn’t want there to be anywhat ifson your part about the decision. I thought I would feel better about being the decision-maker. Turns out I felt like shit, even if it was my decision."

I know we have so much to talk about, but time is short with our friends on the way. I take his face in my hands, hoping he hears my sincerity.

"I'm sorry I put us through this. I was lost. But I think I’ve found myself again."

He pulls me onto of his lap and kisses me tenderly. When his tongue swipes my lips, I open, inviting him in. The passion we have bottled for too long is ready to explode. And much too soon, he slows us down and places his forehead on mine as we catch our breath.

"No more apologies. We're here now, and that’s all that matters. But I do have a question… Why was Caleb still calling you his?"

"I don't know. I can't believe he thinks I would still want to be with him after everything." I shrug.

"You broke up with him? Right?"

Shit, Shit, Shit. I haven't! I have been avoiding him, but I never officially broke up with him.

"Uh…"

I hear the front door open, and the girls announce their presence.

“What’s happening?” Paige says in her most annoying voice, trying to torment me. I watch them in the kitchen putting beer in the fridge.

“What the fuck. The fridge is full!” Josh yells, laughing.

I look to Preston as him and Ethan exchange a knowing nod.

“We’ll be back,” Ethan says as he gets us up grabbing my hand, pulling me with him.

“Where ya going?” Paige continues in her testing way. I widen my eyes at her, and she giggles.

Once in his room, he sits us on his bed. “This is it. Right? No more questions. No more trying to figure shit out. It’s us.”

“If you want me, then yes, it’s us.” I smile reassuringly. He pulls me to him and meets his lips with mine in a quick kiss.

"Then you have to call him and make sure he understands it is over. I can't continue this until I know it’s you and me. No misunderstandings." I pull my phone out of my back pocket.

After a couple of rings, I hear bar noise in the background. "Yeah? What's up?" Caleb says arrogantly, void of any emotion.

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