Page 24 of Courting Envy
"You don't know that," Lucien hissed.
I squeezed his leg, trying to convey to him that it wasn't worth getting twisted up about. Ragnar was clearly making a dig because he knew it would irritate.
"I'd love to show you around our armory sometime, my queen. Maybe our warriors could put on a demonstration for you." I could see the glimmer of interest in his eyes, but then, he was probably making it as clear as daylight to ensure that Lucien picked up on it.
"That does sound interesting," I said, giving him a polite smile before moving on to the others. Two of them were generals in the army, Kyveli, of course, and a few other barons of Envy. It was going to take time to get my head around the hierarchy in this place. Or, maybe I could just find a way to escape and then I'd never have to try.
Maybe there were other places in Hell where I could find sanctuary.
I let the male demons bicker among themselves, smiled vaguely at their plays for my attention, at their continual one upping of each other while I ate my fill of delicious foods. Lucien stewed in the seat next to me, and Kyveli just seemed amused by it all. If I let the barons and commanders all have their way, then I'd spend the rest of eternity traipsing around this circle looking at everything they supposedly had to offer me.
It was hilarious that they thought any of them could offer me what I wanted. Which was to still be alive, living my life. With my friends and career. With my sister.
"Really, though, Queen Rava," Ragnar said as he reached across the table, his big hand coming within inches of mine. "I would love to learn what plans you have for this place. I'd love to give you some of my own suggestions."
"Not before me," Strom interjected, clapping his hands together once to emphasize his point. Vitner shoved him, and Strom fell off his chair, slamming to the floor with a wet thud.
"Oh my gods," I said, shooting to my feet. While I'd been enjoying the food, their banter had gone from the occasional jab to physical aggression, and I could feel the tension filling the air. Any moment now, someone would draw blood. Lucien reached for my elbow and stopped me from moving to check on the demon.
"Enough." Lucien slammed a fist down on the table, and all eyes flicked to him. The gold flecking his body seemed to twitch and snap like he'd combust any moment. "Give her some space. She has been gracious enough to dine with you all, now leave."
When no one made a move, he stood and clicked his fingers. Reon snapped to attention and other snakelike demons slithered from their places beside the walls. I'd not even noticed them when I'd come in, so focused on the grand table and those who were arranged around it.
The barons and commanders all left their seats and headed for the doors, though with much grumbling and unhappiness. The only one who was silent was Kyveli, who threw me one backwards glance as she left the room.
Reon went over and swung the doors closed, and the other serpents faded back to the walls again.
"I had no wish for the evening to go like that," Lucien said, scrubbing a hand across his face as if the meal had left him exhausted. I could see corded muscles in his neck, and under other circumstances I would have offered him a massage. Right now, I wasn't ready to be that close to him. Not yet.
His actions in showing me who he really was, and just now in seeing that I was getting overwhelmed and stepping in to protect me helped. We could get there. I wanted to get there because I couldn't deny the way that I was drawn to him despite everything. A life in Hell was not part of my plan, but there were perks to being here.
"I'd imagine that unpredictable is the norm in Hell," I said, offering him a shrug. I knew it wasn't his fault, and I didn't want him to blame himself.
"You're right," he said, shaking his head. His shoulders relaxed a little, and he sank back into his seat. My body twitched to sit next to him, to feel his heat radiate through me. I held back though, only allowing myself to put a hand on his shoulder and squeeze.
"What am I doing here?" I asked. "You told me that you needed me. That I'm the key. I gather there is a curse that needs to be broken."
Lucien sighed.
"Sit down," he said, then added, "please?" When he turned those emerald eyes on me, I couldn't resist.
I slipped into the seat next to him, but turned so that only my knees touched his. "Are you finally going to explain what the fuck is going on? Because I'm tired, Lucien. And lost."
His jaw clenched, but he said, "I don't want you to ever feel lost when you're with me. Rava. I didn't just bring you here because I thought you were the key. Everything I said on earth was true. You're a goddess, and your voice drew me in, enthralled me. I am in awe of you. Your beauty, your grace, your intelligence. And I know I fucked up by bringing you here. I'm sorry about that but it was the way it had to be done. And I can't undo it. I'm sorry."
An actual apology. From a Prince of Hell. Now that was something. I could see so much that he was trying, that he genuinely knew he’d done me wrong. But he was right. He couldn’t undo it now.
"I want to see my sister," I said. "I want to know that she’s okay." I wanted to let them know that I was okay too, but I didn't think he was going to want to hear that.
"It's impossible," Lucien said. "You can't return to earth until you've embraced Envy. Until we've broken the curse."
"So how the heck do we do that?" I demanded. This was all horribly frustrating and vague, and I had a feeling that I wasn't going to like the answer that he gave me. His head fell back and he groaned.
"I haven't worked that out yet,” he admitted, and I knew those words cost him something.
It didn’t change the fact that it was the last thing I wanted to hear.
"Right. Great! Just wonderful." I pushed my chair back and stood. "I'm going to bed. It's been the weirdest day of my life and maybe tomorrow I can wake up and find out it was all a dream."
