Page 41 of Loving Carter

“What life decisions?” I ask, narrowing my eyes and studying them closely. Are these two up to something? Are they talking about my plan to leave? I’ve never discussed that with them. In fact, Skylar is the only person I’ve ever discussed it with.

“You’re a young man. You’ll have to make many, many major life decisions over the years. Always remember that the choices you make today create the reality you experience tomorrow,” Tillie says, wagging one finger at me.

“That’s very wise,” Edna says. “Did you read it somewhere?”

“I think it was on the cereal box this morning,” Tillie says, then both aunts laugh.

I’ve lost track of this conversation because I’m simply too hot to stay focused. “Fine. I’ll consider my decisions,” I say, hoping I can escape.

“How’s Skylar?”

This question comes from Edna, but both women have stopped rocking and are looking at me.

“She’s fine,” I say.

“You didn’t go see her this morning,” Tillie points out. “Edna and I were up early, and we always see you drive away in the morning, heading to town to see Skylar.”

“I don’t go to see Skylar,” I tell them. “I go to have breakfast.”

“With Skylar.” Tillie folds her hands in her lap.

Edna looks at her, then does the same thing.

I look right back at them and say, “It’s not with her. It’s at her business.”

“Same thing,” Tillie says.

“Are you happy, dear?”

This question comes from Edna, but Tillie is obviously as interested. I could tell them the truth—no, I’m not happy. I want to go back to work in finance. When I was in Dallas, I was building something that meant a great deal to me, something important. I was independent and successful. I’m not either of those things running the dude ranch.

But it’s too soon to have this conversation. I need to get the ranch through all summer sessions. Then I need to find a reliable manager who can take over. Only then can I tell the aunts what I want to do.

“I’m good,” I say.

“Are you sure? We don’t want you to be unhappy,” Edna says.

I look at her, then at Tillie. I love both of these ladies, and I would never do anything that would make them unhappy. I open my mouth, planning on lying to them, but find myself saying, “I have to go check on the donkey.”

Then I walk away. Behind me, I can hear Tillie say, “Carter, we don’t have a donkey.”

I just keep walking. Aunt Tillie is wrong. Wedohave a donkey because more times than I can count over the past few weeks, I’ve acted like a real jackass.

***

Skylar

“WE’RE GOING TO NEEDto rent some tables,” Bill Dunlap says at the next committee meeting.

I’m doodling on the notepad I brought with me. I’ve been doodling since the meeting started almost an hour ago. Carter isn’t here, which should make me happy. I was serious when I told him we both need to think about things. It’s good that he’s taking some time to do just that. Yep, it’s a good thing.

I hope.

I go back to doodling. Every time I doodle, I wish I had immense artistic talent and that I could draw something spellbinding. Instead, I end up with squiggly lines.

“Skylar?”

I blink. It’s Bill. He’s caught me doodling.