Page 14 of Chelsea’s Knight

“What? Comfortable,” she mumbles in a sleepy voice.

“At least one of us is,” I mutter underneath my heated breath.

Her voice hitches and I realize she’s fully awake and aware of her surroundings now because her leg slowly moves back, and she agonizingly rolls over so she’s not facing me.

“I’m so sorry,” she quietly apologizes, her back now to me. Even in the dark, I can almost guarantee she’s a bright red, and under normal circumstances, I’d be grinning, but hearing the shakiness in her voice has me frowning instead.

“Chelsea, look at me,” I command, unwilling to allow her to feel any semblance of shame for snuggling up to me while she was in a dead sleep.

“No, no, it’s okay, Canyon. You can go now. I’m so sorry. I’ll be fine. I’m always fine.”

“Not before you hear what all I have to say, babe. In another time, down the road for us, I will gladly allow you to be sprawled all over me, knowing it’s going to lead to me being buried in your wet heat. Now’s not that place or time, Chelsea, because simply put, we’re still getting to know each other and you’re not ready for things to traverse down that road. Doesn’t mean I don’t want you with every fiber of my being, but you’re going to take the lead with how far and fast this goes when things do eventually happen. Do you understand what I’m saying to you, sweetheart?”

“I think so.” Her voice is whisper soft, so quiet in fact that if I wasn’t listening as intently as I am for a response, I wouldn’t have heard her reply. “You’re saying I’m going to be like Gia and the other women.”

“Yes, you’ll be my old lady.” I leave no room for my words to be misinterpreted. I’m firm and crisp with my confirmation.

“Even if I’m slightly broken and may always be?” she timidly asks.

“Definitely because it’s no secret that I happen to be broken too, sweetheart. The best, strongest relationships are those where the couple works through old shit and reinforces what they have with respect, love, loyalty, and trust. We’re gonna be that couple. You will be my reward and I will be yours. All of the years we shoveled shit means we’ll be stronger together.”

“Okay.” Her word is a positive one, but the way it’s thrust out there has me raising a brow. She may not fully get it as of yet, but she soon will. I’ll accept nothing less.

“Okay?” I probe, curling up behind her and wrapping my arm around her waist. “Are you sure, Chelsea? There are no take backs once I claim you before the club and make you my old lady. It’s for life. There is no running away from each other when things get rough and rowdy.”

“So, like a marriage?”

“Not exactly. If you get married, you can always get a divorce. However, in our world, taking someone as your old lady is permanent. I’m sure there are some out there who have broken that bond, but we aren’t like that in our club. Old ladies are for life.”

Chelsea

“You’ve given me a lot to think about,” I finally say, blowing out a puff of air.

Not that I don’t love the idea of being part of this family, of becoming his old lady. I mean, he’s about ten or so years older than me, but that doesn’t matter one bit to me. The concern I have is he’s obviously worldly and experienced and well, I’m just me.

I never dated again after that horrible winter dance where a group of unsavory assholes destroyed my reputation and trust in the male species. It wasn’t only because of that incident, of course, it was also because of my seizures and the embarrassment of how they control my day-to-day life.

What guy wants to be saddled with a woman who might fall out at any given time and seize uncontrollably?

It’s a lot to ask of anyone, no matter how upstanding they happen to be.

“Just speaking the god’s honest truth, Chels. I’m sure you’ve got a lot swirling in your head right now. We can break it down piece by piece now or try and get some sleep and we’ll talk about it later in the morning. Your choice.”

“You won’t leave me?” Abandonment is one of my greatest fears. It makes me vulnerable and downright angsty. It likely started when my mom passed away while I was still very young, so young in fact I don’t remember her.

Toss in the fact I lived in a literal hell for most of my formative years until what was happening was brought into the open, and I’m used to being on my own. Even my grandparents left me.

Granted it was due to their deaths, but still, at this point, I expect everyone to leave me.

“Not if we can sleep like this.” I can tell he’s now on the outside of the comforter while I’m snuggled inside. He’s spooning me from behind with his arm around my waist, trapping me, but at the same time, I’ve never felt so safe in my entire life. It’s as if I’m in a warm, snuggly cocoon and his arms are the weapons which will protect me during my slumber.

“I’d like that,” I shyly admit. I know I need to tell him more about me, my past, my lack of experience, but tomorrow’s another day. Or, rather, later on is soon enough. I feel him lace his fingers with mine then he kisses my temple. “Good night, Canyon.”

“Good night, Chels.”

CHAPTERFOUR

Chelsea

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