Page 108 of Ruby Malice

At this point, I wouldn’t even blame her.

Kirill turns to me once they’re gone. “I never would have guessed there’d be someone in your family even more annoying than you are.”

I spin around and shove against his chest. Of course he doesn’t budge. Stupid, solid wall of muscle. “Why did you do that? I was handling things.”

He screws up his face, ready to argue. Then seems to change his mind. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. I forget that ‘handling things’ means something very different for you than it does for the rest of the human population.”

I groan. “Can you—Can we just not? I can’t handle any of this right now.”

“You shouldn’t let her treat you like that,” he says instead of relenting.

“And you shouldn’t get involved in my private life. That was between me and my sister. I did not need you to step in for me.”

Kirill arches a dark brow. “Now, you’re the one teaching me about boundaries?”

“This is different! You sent me up to work with Ilya. But you don’t even know Lana,” I explain. “She’s just upset. Brady almost drowned. I know what it’s like to take care of someone and lose them… or nearly lose them, anyway. She’s scared.”

And protective. She doesn’t want me around Brady or Lily right now. The same way I intercepted messages and calls from Lana and Alexis to Mom. They didn’t show up for her the way they should have, and some days, it was easier for Mom to think they hadn’t called than to hear the impersonal voicemails they left when they knew damn well she’d be sleeping or at an appointment.

Lana will do anything to take care of Brady. I may not have kids, but I understand that. I respect it.

“That doesn’t give her the right to talk to you like you’re a child.”

I snort. “Coming from the man who is always telling me I don’t know anything, that’s rich.”

“That’s different. Your sister is an overreacting bitch, whereas I’ve saved your life twice. My advice is worth listening to.”

“Advice?” I scoff. “You don’t advise. You command.”

Kirill lowers his chin. His green eyes catch the afternoon light and they practically glow. “Fine. But when I tell you what to do… I make sure you like it.”

The memory of his mouth on me, his fingers inside of me, fills my mind. Heat washes through me, settling low. Without even meaning to, I lean forward.

But the second I realize what I’m doing, I pull back. “God. How do you do that? Turn it on and off like that,” I explain, waving a hand in his general direction. “It’s like a light switch. Or a tractor beam. I hate you. I want to punch you in the dick. And then, without warning,bam.”

“Bam?” There’s amusement in his voice. The urge to land a solid blow between his legs rises.

“You draw me in,” I explain. “You have super pheromones or something. And sad, vulnerable women are more susceptible. I have no interest in you right now, but here I am, leaning in.”

On a normal day, I wouldn’t admit any of this so openly. But today isn’t a normal day. Today cannot become my normal.

“This is too much right now,” I blurt. “Everything is falling apart, and I can’t handle you on top of everything else.”

“I don’t have to be on top.”

I sigh, and he seems to shrug. It’s not an apology. But it is eye-opening.

“This is how things always are between us. This is how they would always be. We butt heads and argue. We want different things at different times.” I shake my head. “I want this to be simple. Purely physical. But I’m not sure that’s possible for me anymore. Not when you can draw me in like that. Not when you have a sway over me that I don’t hold over you. If I’m not careful, I’ll get sucked under.”

The fact that part of me is willing to risk that means Lana was right about one thing: I’d never sacrifice Brady or Lily on the altar of Kirill, but I’d sacrifice myself.

And I have to ask… for what?

For Kirill to get bored of me and move on? For him to leave in three months while I go find another job and never see him again? There is no world where things between us end well.

My goal in moving here was to get closer to my sister. I wanted to spend time with what little family I have left. Instead, I just shoved them even further away. And why? Because I was too busy staring at Kirill without a shirt on.

“You know what I’d like?” I say, making the decision all at once.

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