Page 37 of My Infatuation with Isabella

“It’s a downhill. Let’s ride the cart to the car.”

“Yes! Hop on.”

And it stays there as I open the trunk. It stays there as I pack all the grocery bags inside.

“You can’t even keep up the bad boy persona for a second. No, you’re definitely getting Baby Biebs now. We’re doing this and you’re going to sing your heart out.”

I seem to be doing everything on autopilot. I close the trunk and as soon as Fran gets into the passenger seat; I lock the doors and only unlock them after I return the cart and get back to the car. My association with grocery stores may have changed. I no longer feel the panic and anxiety, but my wariness in a parking lot will never go away.

“Are you okay?” Francesca asks when I hop into the driver’s seat. “You seem very distracted today.”

“I’m fine. I’m just...tired. It’s been a long week.”

“Yeah, you haven’t been sleeping.” She reaches over to touch my cheek. “Is something troubling you?”

So many things. “No.”

The concern in her green eyes draws me back to her. She reminds me of what’s important and what matters to me now. The past is in the past and that’s where Isabella needs to stay. I don’t know why she lied, but the fact is that lie ended our relationship. That lie ripped my heart out. And knowing that itisa lie makes me hate her even more. My resentment toward her has increased exponentially since I found out the truth, yet I still can’t stop thinking about her and this stupid lie.

“I’m fine, I promise.” I take Fran’s hand and kiss her knuckles. “I think I just need sleep, so if you don’t mind, I’m gonna bail tonight and just stay at home.”

“Then I’ll stay at home with you.”

I just want to be alone. “No, go out and enjoy yourself with your friends. You haven’t seen Helen and Tori in ages. Have dinner with them and reminisce about how much fun you guys used to have in college.”

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?”

I start the car and back out of the parking bay. “Yeah. I’ll probably be asleep by eight.”

She pouts. “It’s going to be so boring without you. You’re usually the life of the party.”

“Amongst nerdy members of the medical fraternity, even a corpse could be the life of the party.”

“There wouldn’t be a corpse because one of us would save him before he died.” She slaps my arm playfully. “And I’ll have you know that members of the medical fraternity are alotof fun, especially those of us who make chicken exciting with garlic and herb mayo.”

“Wow, Fran, you really know how to have a good time.”

She giggles, then reaches over to interlink her fingers with mine. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

And I do. I adore her. She’s amazing. She’s faithful and kind and beautiful...andnota fucking liar!

* * * * *

“SOMETHING IS DEFINITELYwrong.”

I stop punching the bag and look toward the door of my gym room, the door that was supposed to be closed. “There’s a sign on the door for a reason, Fran,” I say through rapid breaths. “Please leave. I’ll talk to you when I’m done.”

“Did something happen with Dana? You only get like this when she?”

“No, I get like this when I want to be left alone to blow off steam.”

“Why do you need to blow off steam?”

I shut my eyes and grit my teeth to stop the snappy comment that’s on the tip of my tongue. Rubbing my face against my shoulder, I wipe away the droplets of sweat and continue punching.

“So, you’re not going to answer me?”

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