Page 120 of The Parkers' Handsome Holiday
"Hey, Becca."
"Hey. Where are you? I miss you."
"I'm out at my dad's place." I glanced around as my heart ached. "I figured you'd want some time to yourself."
"Well, you figured wrong." She let out a soft sigh. "Tell me where you are, and I'll be there in a few minutes. I want to see you. I'd love to meet your family too."
"It's just my dad and my sister. My mother-"
"I know your mom died, Jason. I listen when you talk, baby." Her voice was soft, but I could hear the subtle hint of pain in it. What were we doing? Tearing each other apart because I wanted more than she was going to give me? Or because I wanted it faster? Or hell, maybe it was because I wanted it all.
"You don't have to do that." I lifted my chin toward the sky and brushed my hand down my face. I wanted to see her so damn bad. To hold her and force her to promise me that she wasn't going to tear my heart out. I had plenty to lose. What was I thinking? I could lose her. I was risking my future, my heart, my deepest desires.
"I want to. Please don't turn me away."
"Never." I let out a sigh. "I'll give you the address. I'll text it to you. It's just down the road from your place."
"Okay. I'll see you soon."
I dropped the call, texted her the place and walked back to the house.
My father opened the door and stared at me. "Everything all right?”
“I guess. I don’t know.” I shrugged. “Giving Becca space sounds like a good idea, but it ain’t gonna happen. I want to move in closer, not back up.”
He gave me a look. “Nat said you were having women troubles. But that’s partly because you don’t listen."
I shook my head. "She's full of shit. I'm not having troubles, I'm just dealing with an older woman who thinks I'm still a boy, and I do listen, Dad."
"No you don’t, and you are still a boy." He moved back and reached out to grip the back of my neck as we moved into the house. "Though, you're a lot like my daddy, your granddaddy. Old soul in a young body."
"I love her. I want to put a ring on her finger and a baby in her belly, but she's not going to allow that." I shrugged and dropped down at the kitchen table, feeling like I weighed a million pounds.
"Then take your time with her." My dad sat down beside me. "Your mom was six years younger than me, but smart as a whip. She wanted what the hell she wanted, and there wasn't no telling her no. You're just like her."
"I could give this woman the world, Dad. I want to."
"Good, but maybe she ain't the type to want the world handed to her." He lifted his eyebrow as a smile played on the side of his mouth. How in the world he was making it without Mom was a mystery to me. If something happened to Becca... something wasn’t going to happen to Becca.
I was going to lose her if I wasn't careful.
"Maybe so." I glanced down at my hands as the sound of a car door filled up the kitchen. "That's her. Be nice, all right?"
"Am I ever not nice?" He patted my back as I snorted. There was no reason to answer that question.
He was an ass, and I had to be careful not to act just like him.
CHAPTER 9
REBECCA
I knew he was pulling back. I could tell by the way he stayed busy all week at work, and avoided me most evenings. He was studying for his CPA, so I understood about his evenings being taken up by that, but it was something more.
I'd spent half the morning pacing the floor while Parker gave me hell at the house. His words hurt a little, but he was right. I needed to stop pushing Jason away and start moving forward. I just hoped like hell that it wasn't too late for that. It almost seemed like it by the sound of his voice on the phone moments before.
I parked outside the older two-story house. The land around it was beautiful and the lake was just down the road. I couldn't help but wonder if he grew up in the house.
He walked out as I climbed out of my car and held my breath. I was going to cry if I wasn't careful. Nothing made sense in a relationship with someone so much younger, and yet I was overthinking everything. That, and I wasn't being very fair. He was giving up everything and risking his heart. What more could someone risk? Was my heart so much more precious than his?
