Page 276 of Dirty Discipline, Vol. 1

“Sorry, wasn’t thinking it might shock you. I forget sometimes how naïve you colonists are—no offence,” he added.

She couldn’t really be offended because he was right. There was so much she hadn’t considered, but it wasn’t like she’d had a choice. She hadn’t made the decision to leave; she’d been thrust out.

“I was exiled because I refused to go along with their breeding program. Ironic really, when you think about it. Maybe I should have just let them do it.” She sighed and wiped the back of her mouth with her hand.

“You can’t fight nature, Mara.” He sounded like someone who had tried and was now resigned to just accepting the way things were.

She might end up feeling that way too, but she wasn’t willing to give up yet. “When you said you were claiming me, I assumed you would force me to mate with you.” She avoided looking at him, and her hand went up to push her hair back out of her face in a nervous gesture. “I thought at least there wouldn’t be any worry about pregnancy because you would be sterile.”

“I’m sorry I was rough with you earlier. I meant what I said about punishing you if you don’t obey, don’t mistake me on that,” he cautioned her. “But I’m sorry. Sometimes I forget how to deal with people. I claimed you, but I should have explained what it meant.

“Claiming’s an old thing. Our people abandoned it long before we started to colonize, so my parents said anyway. But we do it different here. It just means I’m taking responsibility for you, and—” He paused for a long moment. “Any children.”

She jerked. Her mouth already opening to protest, but he shook his head and held up a hand to silence her.

“Look, I know. I get it. I’m not going to force mating on you. I like my women willing and eager for it anyway. But sooner or later your body’s urges are going to kick in and we both know it. Claiming females keeps them safe, and then later, if there are children, it protects them too. If it wasn’t me who claimed you, it would have been someone else, and they might not be as nice about it.”

“But I don’t want any of this,” she protested. Maybe if circumstances were different, he’d be what she wanted. She could already feel the growing attraction between them, but she didn’t want a mate. And after being exiled over refusing to have children, she wasn’t going to give in now when it would be even more of a hardship.

“Yeah, but you’ve got it and there’s not much either of us can do about it. I’m not letting you run off and get yourself killed. Life is harsh out here and one wrong step can be deadly. You’re going to stay right here and obey me, so you can live and keep fighting.”

Her eyes stung with tears, but she blinked them away angrily. None of it was fair, none of it. There wasn’t much to say after that. She stayed quiet, huddling near the fire. He offered her more food. The thick meat broth, that he warmed by dropping sizzling hot stones into it, smelled delicious and she couldn’t resist. Besides, she figured she better fill up while she had the chance.

Later she watched him as he slept on the far side of the fire. He’d been so heavy-handed when they’d met, but it hadn’t lasted. In his own way he was trying to be kind and she could see that now. That didn’t mean she was okay with the whole ‘females must be subjugates’ attitude that seemed to be in force outside of the colony dome.

She had mixed feelings about the dominant way he’d taken control and told her what she had to do. On one hand it stirred something primal inside of her. Having someone take care of her and keep her safe was oddly appealing. But she also didn’t like being told what she could and couldn’t do. It grated on her.

As a child she’d broken more rules than most, and it seemed like every day she was being scolded for something else. She’d outgrown the rebellion, for the most part. At least she thought she had. Now, she began to wonder if she hadn’t just submerged that part of herself to fit in better.

And how much of that had been the drugs they’d been feeding the colonists too? Was that why obeying seemed to be so much easier for all her agemates? She’d never understood why she seemed to be the only one who had trouble following the rules, but if that came from the same drug resistance it made sense.

As for Jahk, there was an attraction there she couldn’t deny, and part of her wanted to stay with him, but that was the problem. If she did, it wouldn’t be long before her body would make a choice for her. If she didn’t want to end up bearing his offspring she couldn’t be there when it happened.

She’d never been through heat, no one she knew had. The implants suppressed all the messiness until it was time to breed, but she’d read about it. She knew the urge to mate would be overpowering. If she was anywhere near a male, she would have no choice. Neither would he.

The biological imperative to breed was strong in her people, and she wasn’t going to fool herself into thinking she had the willpower to hold it off. Her best bet was just to be far enough away that nothing could happen.

When she was sure he was deeply asleep, she quietly got to her feet and retrieved her pack. She slipped out of the cave and started walking towards the trees. If she were lucky, she’d have a couple hours head start before he woke. If not—she’d find out if his threats were a bluff or not.

Chapter Six

Mara was chilled, and her feet were sore, but she forced herself to keep walking. It was the only thing keeping her warm, and she needed to be far away before Jahk woke up and started looking for her. The moment he saw her pack was gone, he’d know she hadn’t just stepped out to answer a call of nature, and then he’d come.

She didn’t know how well he would be able to track her. The ground was dry; it hadn’t rained recently so she left no footprints, but he was a hunter and there had to be some tracking ability involved in that. She had no idea what signs she was leaving behind as she passed. All she could do was try to move carefully.

As the sky started to brighten, the urge to hurry made it harder to move with slow, deliberate steps. Every broken twig and flattened plant made her wince, as she imagined a wide swatch of destruction pointing the way to her.

She was hoping to find some place hidden to shelter, so that once the rising suns were fully up, she could settle in and sleep through the day. It would make it harder for him to find her if she wasn’t moving, she hoped. More important, she was exhausted and badly needed some solid rest before she dropped in her tracks.

Respite came in an unexpected way, when a misstep sent her crashing through the ground into a deep hole. There was no chance to save herself and she landed hard on the bottom with all the air knocked out of her. She lie there dazed, as she stared up at the sky through a broken latticework of roots and branches.

She sat up slowly and started a careful assessment of her body. Luckily, she hadn’t broken anything on the way down and the dirt bottom wasn’t hard as it could have been. There were an assortment of bumps and bruises, but she couldn’t feel anything worse, so she got to her feet slowly.

The walls of the pit offered no hand or footholds, nothing she could use to pull herself up and the rim was far out of reach. The floor, when investigated, offered no tools that she could use either. There weren’t even any rocks she could pile up to stand on. It hadn’t occurred to her, at first, but now she wondered if she was in a purposely made trap.

The way the branches and vines crossed each other to cover the hole seemed a little too designed to be natural. And while the walls of the pit weren’t entirely smooth, she couldn’t imagine what would have created it by accident. It occurred to her that perhaps it had been made for trapping animals; if so, that meant someone would probably be along eventually to check.

The only problem with that, was that she wasn’t entirely sure she wouldn’t be considered prey too. A different kind, perhaps, but still. Jahk had warned her that other males would try to claim her, and they wouldn’t be so nice about it. She believed him and her decision to creep away in the middle of the night seemed incredibly stupid now.

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