Page 262 of Dirty Discipline, Vol. 2

The biggest fear lodged in my chest, the one where I was worried my Master hated me, dissipates the moment he says ‘my love.’ It’s that one phrase that lets me know we’re okay and that he doesn’t hate me.

No doubt Chelsea is far more worried about the punishment than what Master Grigori thinks, but for me, it’s always been about Master Jeremy and not wanting him to leave me. I finally found my happily ever after. I bear his collar and his ring. The worst punishment of all would be to have all of it stripped away from me.

Hunching down in front of me, Master Jeremy forces my face upwards. “Words. Now.”

I stare at him for several moments, my lips quivering as the fears assail me. “I don’t want you to leave me,” I manage to blubber out before yanking my chin away and staring at the floor.

“I need you to listen and listen carefully. I own you, Melody Davenport. I own every fucking inch of your body, and that includes your mind, heart, and soul. You’re not getting away from me that easily. I am not now, nor ever getting rid of you. You. Are. Mine.”

Hazarding a glance back up, I note the resolve in his face, the stern set to his jaw. My fingers inch up, grazing the collar, rubbing the smooth surface like a worry stone.

“I just hate upsetting you, and this time—”

“This time, you messed up. You know it, I know it, and everyone else here knows it. But Mouse, it doesn’t matter how many fuckups happen. One, ten, a hundred, a million. The only thing that will ever make me leave your side is if you tell me you no longer love me. And even then, I’d probably tie you to the bed and fuck some sense into you.”

He pauses for a moment, his eyes searching mine. “I don’t know what words to say or how to convey your safety with me. I know you never had that, and this must be a foreign concept to you, but know this: as long as there is breath in my lungs, you will always find absolution with me. I won’t shut you out, I won’t gaslight you, and I won’t make you sit and wonder if I’m mad at you. You will know it, because we will talk about it like fucking adults. Granted, you’ll be kneeling at my feet for the discussion, but it counts all the same. And when I punish you today, you will know that I still love you. I will still marry you.”

A weight drifts off my shoulders as he rises, presumably still waiting for Master Grigori and Chelsea to show up. But just as quickly another fear takes its place. I almost missed the fact that Dr. Andrew is the one who designed this punishment. What in the world could it possibly be?

My imagination takes off, going through every possible avenue while my body quakes. He knows our deepest fears and has no trouble exploiting them for his nefarious purposes. It almost makes me wonder if this is truly going to be a fair punishment, or if he’s going to take out further aggravation on me for what happened with Chastity.

Before my mind can come to a conclusion, the heavy tread of Master Grigori and Mr. Sergei’s boots cut it off. They’re back. It’s now or never. Stepping in front of us, Dean Anderson frowns as Chelsea takes her place back by my side.

All thoughts of anger towards her flee as I take in her tearstained face and miserable expression. This is the first time I’ve ever seen her so soft, so approachable. I want to reach out, to tell her not to cry, but I don’t dare move. No doubt she’ll just spurn me and cuss me out, making the punishment that much worse.

“Melody Davenport and Chelsea Harmon, you have both acted atrociously, ruining the initiation of our newest submissive. It is my understanding that Dr. Andrew has prepared the punishment for you both, and both of your dominants have agreed to go along with it.”

With quick, lithe steps, Dr. Andrew makes his way to Dean Anderson, his cruel smile piercing me through the heart. Glancing over at Chelsea, I look to see her reaction, but she seems unaffected, as if Dr. Andrew holds no fear for her. If only I could be brave like that.

The fact that I have anything positive to think toward Chelsea is a shock, but it’s true. Underneath our animosity, there’s a begrudging feeling of admiration and jealousy. I’ve never been brave like her; I don’t even know how to start.

“Since you two seem to fight like siblings,” Dr. Andrew intones, “I propose something similar to a get-along shirt. Only, since we’re kinky, devious fuckers, it’s going to be far worse and much more… intimate.”

My stomach plummets as Chelsea and I look at each other. Her eyes fill with horror, an expression that no doubt mirrors my own as we both try and process what he’s saying. Without any further explanation, he steps down as the lights extinguish all at once, leaving us in pitch darkness. My mind freaks out as my other senses come alive, seeking out what’s coming next.

Fear is the only thing I can think of that fuels me forward as I reach out and grab Chelsea’s hand. We’re in this together, so we might as well be a strength to each other. I fully expect her to rebuff me, to shove my hand to the side and fight me again, but miraculously, she curls her fingers around mine and gives a squeeze.

In this, at least, I have an ally. It’s her strength I cling to as hands grab me about the waist and hoist me up. Then, in the very center of the room, a spotlight illuminates a pair of spanking benches, lined up and close together.

Still hand in hand, we walk towards our doom, pausing as we reach the sumptuous leather. “On the bench, submissives,” Dean Anderson barks out.

After one final squeeze, I drop Chelsea’s hand and climb on, resting in the fact that Master Jeremy is behind me, the heat of his hand on my back settling my nerves. Once they position us how they want us, both Master Jeremy and Master Grigori walk to the front and stare us down.

“Anything either of you wish to say before we begin? But know that no matter what words leave your lips, you’re still going to be punished.”

I glance over at Chelsea, my heart in my throat. Despite this moment of camaraderie between us, I fear it won’t last. It’s not that I’m hoping for us to be back at each other’s throats, but I can’t see how one little moment is going to change the trajectory of our relationship. At best, I can possibly see us as frenemies, but I don’t dare hope for anything more.

She watches me, her lips tensing as if she wants to say something, but she too remains silent. It’s just as I thought. At least there aren’t waves of hostility wafting off of her. That’s honestly the best outcome that’s happened yet. Master Jeremy reaches out and skims his thumb across my lip, drawing a soft gasp.

He’s so tender, and yet, I can feel the steel of his resolve in that touch. No matter what punishment is given to me, he won’t hold back, and truthfully, I don’t want him to. I need this absolution. I need him to take this burden of guilt off of me so that we can be okay again… no, so that I can be okay again.

This is my issue to work out and not his. He’s made it clear that he still loves me. It’s up to me to figure out how to believe him, to rest in the knowledge that even if I mess up, he’s still going to be there for me, steadfast, not leaving or shutting me out.

Next to me, Master Grigori threads his hands through Chelsea’s hair, gripping tightly and forcing her neck backwards until she’s looking up at him. The desire is evident in the soft moan spilling from her lips and the wiggle of pleasure she gives on the bench. Here I am doing my best to be repentant and take my punishment as a good girl should, and there she is, getting off on it.

The difference between us has never been more startling. Again, that frisson of anger builds in my gut, threatening to take over. Why can’t I be more carefree like her? Why can’t I just give myself over to Master Jeremy and trust him to not let me fall?

Bitter tears build in my eyes, but are soon brushed away by my Master’s loving hand. I look up at him, my body quivering under the heat of his lustful gaze. Perhaps she and I are the same after all, just different points on the same spectrum.

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