Page 36 of The Lies You Love
I slide my phone from my pocket and send out one last text to Grey before I take care of the only problem I can at the moment. “Take off your fucking clothes, Auden,” I say. “If I think about this too long, I’ll go crazy.”
“We’re supposed to fuck when I’m worried about my friend being in trouble?”
I nod. “Exactly. There’s nothing we can do right now. Your friend is safe right now at her home?” Auden nods. I go on. “I want to be inside you before I lose my mind.” Tugging off my shirt over my head, I toss it and step out of my jeans. My cock springs free, and that’s all it takes to get Auden on board. Her desire is palpable. The desire in her gaze is molten lava as she looks at me like she’s never seen me naked before.
I cross over to help her get out of her clothes quicker.
“Make no mistake, by the way. This is me claiming you as mine.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
Auden
Despite everything I’ve done to deter him, and I do mean everything, even if some was unwittingly, Beck stays. More than stays, he wants me with such a fervor that there’s no way I don’t feel wanted on the deepest emotional level possible. Ramsey might call it just fucking, but what Beck does to my body defies all logic—the man worships at the altar of my orgasms. He kisses me wildly, passionately, as he fucks me. I’m sweaty, dripping in him, surrounded by his heat and desire, watching his eyes screw shut moments before he comes. For the second time tonight. The first time I rode him backward, he came quicker than he wanted to, so after making me come by means of his mouth, bent over the bathroom counter, we went for another round on a comforter spread on the floor. Beck pulls out of me and spills across my stomach, his face a mask of disbelieving pleasure. His lashes open, and his eyes meet mine.
I see it again, and a tiny surprised inhale escapes. The end of us. It’s a visceral, triggering movie that plays inside my mind. “You okay,” Beck pants, placing a kiss on my neck. “Did I hurt you?”
I shake my head, placing a kiss against his temple. “Never. I’m fine. I’ll be sore for a week, but I’m fine.”
Tucking my face into his neck, I avoid eye contact because the image of losing Beck swallows me whole. Why, though? Because I fell so hard and fast or is it because I know there is something more than meets the eye that draws us together? What we have isn’t normal, and we do have some live wire attraction to each other. “I’ll never get enough of you,” I say, pressing my lips against his warm cheek and leaving them there.
Beck grabs the sex towel and wipes my stomach while he catches his breath. Leaning up on my elbows, I watch him, hoping to catch glimpse of something that stands out to me that lends a rational explanation for how much I feel for him. I was nearly assaulted in the woods by a man tonight, and I was able to rebound like this without second-guessing. “Is this what it’s like to fully trust someone?” I ask, biting my bottom lip. “Is that a silly question?” Staring at his fucking magnificent face, I focus on his half-grin as he takes in my question. He licks his lips, and my mouth dries. “Or is this just what good sex makes you feel?”
He flashes a feral smirk that sends a shiver directly to my pussy. “You’ve never been fucked properly.” He reaches over and holds my face in his hand. An emotion passes over his face but disappears as quickly as it came. His hand falls away. “It’s not a silly question.” He looks away, sitting on his haunches, back on his knees. Beck opens his mouth to speak, then closes it. “I’m not someone you should trust. Not all the way.”
My chest tightens. “Why?”
“I’ll never be able to be fully honest with you. My job requires a pact of silence.”
I exhale. “Can you be honest about all the things that matter?” I think of all the white lies Walker told over the course of six years and how they eventually added up to the biggest façade the world ever saw. The biggest one I’ll ever see, that’s for sure. “Relationship stuff, I mean.”
“Relationship, huh?” he says, raising his eyebrows. “Auden.”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry. It’s just that being with you like this makes me feel things. I get dizzy from it. It makes me say things I shouldn’t. Guess I’m just curious.”
He stands, the towel still in hand, and he looks like a goddamn sex monster, muscles bulging, sculpted ass on display, his abs flexing and unfurling with each breath he takes. It’s nearly too much to take. I want him when I have no reason to want him. He just gave me four orgasms—I should be sated and ready to slip into a dreamless sleep at this point. “Don’t apologize,” he says, nearly growling as he runs a free hand over his jawline scruff. “Never apologize for being honest. I’m curious too,” he adds, turning to look down at me still sprawled on the floor. “I feel the same way, and we probably do need to have that ah, relationship talk.”
My stomach flips, and my heart knocks around in my chest, reminding me of how alive I feel in this moment, a moment I nearly never got to live through, an experience I didn’t think I deserved after that fateful night when I fled from Walker and his lies and died, and came back twice. “It’s only been a few days, we don’t have to,” I offer, looking away because the emotion dripping off this beast of a man is all-encompassing.
“I’m going to say it out loud, so there’s never room for you to wonder. You’re mine, Auden. Mine and mine alone. This isn’t something that’s negotiable. I want you. All of you. I do not share. I do not cower. I will not ask permission to pummel any man who tries to take liberties with you. That’s a lot to handle, I know, but those are my thoughts.”
I smirk. “So, was that the relationship talk, then? You staking claim and threatening to beat up any man who looks at me funny?”
“Not funny, like he wants you like I do,” he says. “Yeah, as long as you’re in agreement, and feel the same way about me, then what else needs to be said?”
I’d love to bring up when the month is over and ask what that looks like, but I don’t for fear of a truth I can’t handle. What I can deal with is this.
“I feel the same way about you save for some of that alpha rage jealous stuff you have working.” I tap a finger on my chin. “I’m not complaining, it’s hot, and it’s not really that much to handle. I’m glad you said it out loud. Now I don’t have to wonder if you’re… standing me up.”
He lets out an exasperated sigh. “I still can’t believe you actually thought that. That guy really did a number on you.”
“More than a number,” I whisper, trying not to let sadness taint this glorious moment. “I’m moving on.”
Beck gestures toward the kitchen. “Good. Now that it’s settled, are you hungry?”
“That easy? Just like that?” I follow him down the hallway, intent on his perfect ass.
“Did you want to sign a blood pact?” He turns to ask over his shoulder.
