Page 93 of Pieces Of You

I’m already done with scratching in the three letters of her name while she works on the E of mine.

“So, what other names are you thinking?” I ask, kicking my legs out while leaning back on my outstretched arms.

She tilts her head. “I don’t know.”

“Well, what’s the first thing you think of when you think of him?”

She finishes my name, adding the+in between, before settling both hands on her stomach. And then she turns to me, her eyes bright against the faint autumn sun. “Blessed.”

“Blessed?”

She nods. “I hate to admit it, but… I don’t know if I’d be here without him.”

I suck in a breath, hold it. Because the mere thought of losing Mia… “Don’t get all in your feelings, Holden, because I will, too, and you’ll hate it,” Mia warns, and if she had a stick, she’d be threatening me with it right now.

“I’m not!” Iwas. I pull out my phone as a distraction and type in the browser:Boys names that mean blessed,and scan the names until I find one I like. “Bennett,” I say.

Mia leans into me, looking at my screen. “Huh?”

“Bennett. It means blessed.”

“Bennett,” she repeats, rolling the name on her tongue a few times. And then she smiles, just like she did when we were kids, and I’d give her the last of my ice cream. “Little Bennett.”

“Baby Benny,” I say, looking down at her stomach.

She reaches over and grabs my hand, places it right on her belly. “Baby Benny, meet your Uncle Holden.”

I lift my gaze, push back my emotions—a mixture of pride and warmth and sadness and regret. I lock my eyes on hers—eyes belonging to the only girl I’d give up my entire world for. “I’ll be good for him, Mia, I swear,” I promise. “I’ll get my shit together, and I’ll help raise him, and I’ll be whatever you need—”

She cries. Right into my chest, and I hold her there, and for minutes that feel like hours, we just sit together, staring at a tire swing—a memory of our pasts that we wish so badly we could go back to. But there is no going back. There’s only the future, and the future means growing up and growing old, no matter how uncertain or terrifying it is.

“Holden?” Mia whispers, wiping her snot all over my shirt before pulling away. “Who’s Jamie?”

Eyes wide, my lips part, stay that way.

Mia sighs. “Esme—she told me that it was a shame about you and Jamie, and I pretended like I knew what she was talking about, but… I guess I haven’t really been the best friend to you lately.”

I shake my head. “Mia, don’t.”

“So…” she pushes. “Who is she?”

I heave out a breath, trying to form the words. “She’s…” I kick at the tire swing. “She’s this…”Sunshine and Solace. “She’shometo me.”

Mia frowns. “So what happened?”

I shrug and give her a truth I’d admit only to myself. “I got scared.”

44

Jamie

“Jamie!”Zeke calls, walking into the kitchen of the diner. “Someone’s here to see you.”

“What?” No one ever comes to see me. “Who?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know. Some girl. I assume she goes to your school?”

The only girl I associate with at school is Melanie, and I don’t even think she knows where I work. Dirty dishes and suds to my elbows, I ask, “Are you sure she’s here for me?”

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