Page 37 of Whispers of You
“Abel’s the best dispatcher you have.”
“He’s good in a crisis, but he’s ornery on a good day. He doesn’t have even a smidge of the empathy you do.”
I leaned back against the chair, a little of the worry draining out of me. “Abel has all the empathy in the world. He just hides it under crankiness.”
A grin pulled at Lawson’s mouth. “You may be right there. Either way, you’re my number one.”
I arched a brow. “You sure that’s not because you’ve been looking out for me basically since I was born?”
The twelve years separating him from Grae and me had meant that he was always protective, but over his younger brothers, too. He shrugged. “Maybe. But who says I can’t have favorites?”
“I have a feeling human resources might frown on that.”
“Good thing HR is Anderson, and he’s already drowning in his police work.”
I snickered. “Guess you’re safe.”
Lawson leaned back, his chair squeaking. “You okay?”
I rolled my lips over my teeth as if that would keep me from giving him the truth. “You asking as my boss or as my friend?”
“I’m asking as your surrogate big brother.”
In so many ways, that married the two. Lawson had a calm steadiness about him that made people want to leave their burdens at his feet. He had that quality that I missed in Holt so damn much—that silent assurance that nothing I told him would ever freak him out.
He didn’tseeme the same way Holt had. Holt knew what I was thinking or how I was feeling before I could even find the words. But there was comfort in knowing that I could still keep the worst of my torture to myself around Lawson.
“The call rattled me. It isn’t the first one that has, and it won’t be the last. I can handle it.”
Lawson nodded. “I know youcan,but you’re also allowed to take care of yourself when you get rattled. If you need to take the rest of the day, do it.”
I shook my head. “That would just make things worse. I took a walk around the block. Cleared my head. I’m good.”
“All right. How’s everything else?”
I arched a brow. “Are you digging, Chief Hartley?”
He had the decency to look a little sheepish. “I’ve been known to, time and again.” The hint of humor slipped from his face. “He’s a mess, Wren.”
My fingers curved around the arms of the chair, but I didn’t say a word.
Lawson let his statement hang heavy in the air for a moment. “I know he hurt you, but he was a kid, too. What happened to him, finding you like he did…it can twist a person up.”
“So it’smyfault he bailed?”
“Of course, not. I’m just saying there are as many sides to a story as those who’ve lived it.”
My back teeth ground together. The fact that Lawson made a perfectly reasonable point just stoked my mad. But I breathed through it. “I get it. He was struggling. You think I don’t hate that? But I can’t just forget that he left me when I needed him the most. That what we had wasn’t enough for him to fight through whatever bullshit was swirling in his head.”
I met Lawson’s gaze dead-on. “He broke me, Law. Worse than that bullet. Worse than the agony of waking up after open-heart surgery. Worse than the torture of months of rehab. I can’t just magically forget that happened.”
* * *
I stareddown at my phone, my gaze tracking over the text again and again.
Grae:My best friend isn’t a weak-a biznatch.
I couldn’t help the flutter of my lips. Grae had always had a foul mouth. Probably because she had four older brothers. But when Lawson’s first son was born, she’d done her best to clean up her act. The results were these ridiculous non-cussing curse words.
