Page 61 of Whispers of You
“Was Joe bothering you?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I was just spacing out. Long day.”
My gaze caught on the duffel slung over Holt’s shoulder. It wasn’t the small one he’d brought out of his SUV last night. This one was larger. My throat tightened as I struggled to swallow. “Going back to your life?”
Since the moment he’d shown up, I’d wanted nothing more than for Holt to leave so I could go back to thenormalI’d created for myself. It was safe. But it was also slowly killing me. Like drinking a little bit of poison every day.
Seeing Holt again had reminded me of how I’d used tolive. How we could find fun in the silliest and simplest things. How at peace I’d once felt. It hurt like hell to remember that, but it was so much worse to pretend that it hadn’t existed at all.
Holt’s eyes flared. “Actually, I was going to your place. I wanted to see if I could stay in your extra room.”
My heart lurched, a painful stutter step in my chest. “Why?”
The corner of his mouth kicked up. “I need a place to stay that isn’t run by nosy busybodies.”
I glanced over his shoulder and, sure enough, Ms. Peabody had peeked her head out of the front door of the B&B and was even now watching us like a hawk.
I groaned. “Why is she the worst?”
He chuckled. God, that sound—it was just like I imagined it would be. Deeper. Richer. Like a smoky whiskey that heated you from the inside out. I wanted to drown in that chuckle.
“She has taken it as her personal mission to know everything that happens in this town.”
“And to disseminate the information to every person she comes across,” I grumbled.
“Yeah, I’d like to get out from under that surveillance. Especially since I’m sticking around for a while.”
My traitorous heart picked up its pace. “How long?”
Holt’s thumb swept back and forth across the stubble below his lip. “For the foreseeable future. I need someplace to stay until I can find a longer-term rental.” His deep blue eyes swirled as they bored into mine. “And I hate the idea of you being out at the cabin alone. Especially after today.”
A riot of emotions warred inside me. But that seemed my new normal as long as Holt was around. “It’s not your job to protect me.”
I didn’t say it to be cruel, and that much came across in my tone. It was a simple fact. I’d loved how Holt wanted to care for and protect me a decade ago, but he’d given that away when he let me go. In some ways, it had been a good thing. I’d learned to stand on my own two feet and take care of myself. If Holt had stuck around, I wasn’t sure I ever would have done that.
He stared at me, not looking away. “I know it’s not. But let me do it anyway.”
Those eyes that I had gazed into for over half my life pleaded with me now. They were the same ones that had danced with laughter as Grae and I reenacted scenes fromLittle Women, forcing him and Nash to play Amy and Meg in our band of sisters. The same ones that had filled with tears the day we’d almost lost Grae. The same ones that had shone with love the first time he’d said those three little words to me.
There was only one thing I could say now.
“Okay.”
* * *
My bare feetplodded along the grass as I walked toward the water, Shadow at my side. The sun sank lower in the sky, painting it a beautiful cascade of colors. This time of day usually calmed me, but now my body was strung tight, on alert, listening for any hint of sound.
The crunch of tires on gravel wound my muscles tighter. I didn’t turn around. I stayed focused on the horizon.
Shadow let out a bark, and I patted her head. She would have my back always.
A vehicle door opened and shut.
Shadow let out another bark, this one happier, and then took off running. That had me turning. I watched as my dog happily leaped at Holt’s arrival.
He let out a laugh that carried on the breeze. That sound had barely changed, a little deeper now maybe, but the sound itself, the way it was shaped, was just the same.
Holt gave my girl a good rubdown and then picked up a stick and tossed it in the direction of the lake. Shadow took off running as if she were on a single-minded mission. Holt grinned. “She might make a good SAR dog.”
