Page 44 of The Dark Elf's Surprise Baby

Tears fall onto my shirt as I mourn the relationship I never truly had. I cover my face, sitting down heavily into a leather armchair. “Why?” I ask, looking up at her. “Why did you do it?”

“Do what?” Harper asks, voice sharp. “What did I do?”

“I just want to know who it was,” I tell her. “Please, just tell me who is he? Who is the man you fucked behind my back? Who is the father?”

Harper gapes at me, mouth open and her eyes fill with tears. “Who did you fuck, Harper?” I ask loudly, disgusted by her batlaz tears. “You left me for him, so he must have been a damned good lay. Did you fuck him while you were with me? Did you cheat on me?”

A strangled noise of pain comes out of Harper’s mouth. How dare she act like the victim! I’m the victim here. I stagger to my feet, breathing hard as I stalk forward. “Was he good? How quickly did you spread your legs for him, hah? Did you fuck him in my bed?”

“Please, Demethys!” Harper sobs. “Please stop!”

“So you don’t want to hear about all the ways you betrayed me, little slut?” I ask. “You brought a man into my home, into my bed and you’re suddenly feeling guilty about it?”

I’ve got her against the wall. My mind flashes back to one of the last times I came home from the field, before I was injured in battle and left. I remember pinning her against the wall that time but it was fun, playful and sexy.

Now she just looks at me as though I’m a monster. I hate seeing the look on her face but I need to know. “Did you like it? Was he good for you?” I ask, voice dropping lower as I reach out to touch her cheek. Her blonde hair was always beautiful to me, like the sun shining over a field of wheat. But she flinches when I touch her this time.

“Did he do things that made you see stars?” I ask. I know I’m pushing, but I have to know the details. Some morbid part of me needs to know if she liked him better. Is that why she left me for him?

“I bet you took him into my office,” I tell her accusingly. “I bet you got on your knees for him like the whore you are. Always ready to spread your legs for any dark elf who looked your way, weren’t you?”

Harper throws her hands up over her face, lurching backwards into the wall like she’s been struck. My hand goes down to her arm, attempting to keep her from falling over but I don’t realize my grip keeps tightening.

“Demethys, stop,” Harper says, trying to draw her arm away.

“I can’t look at you right now,” I tell her, a growl in my voice. “I can’t stand the sight of you. You’ve betrayed everything between us. I thought you loved me. I thought you cared. But you’re just another human slut.”

“Demethys!” Harper sounds frantic and she’s jerking her arm now. “Stop, please! You’re hurting me! Please let me go! Don’t be like this!”

I look down and realize I’ve got my hand around her upper arm and I’m squeezing hard enough to bruise. Immediately I let go and drop my hands, holding them up to show that I won’t touch her again, that she’s safe from me.

What have I become? What’s happened to me? How could I hurt her like this? I’ve turned into some angry, bitter, ugly monster because of my emotions. I’ve never done this before. I feel ill.

My stomach lurches and I turn back to face her. She’s sobbing and looking like a frightened dae. I can’t do this to her. I can’t hurt her. I love her too much. I turn away and leave, refusing to look back.

She doesn’t deserve this. I might be angry but I’m not an abusive monster. I’ve gone too far. I’ve turned into something ugly and hateful. This isn’t me. I need to get away, to clear my head.

I’m leaving when I hear her call my name in a broken, pleading voice. It hurts so much to hear that. I want to turn back, to rush to her and beg for forgiveness. To ask what happened to her.

But I can’t. I can’t bring myself to do it. No matter what she did, she still left me. She left and had a child that isn’t mine. The child is a constant reminder of what we could have had.

She betrayed me. I don’t understand why. I know I’m being unfair but she betrayed me first. I’ve got to go. I’ve got to clear my head.

I start walking again and head out into the cool evening, letting the air wash over me as I think about seeing her face in that crowd. It was like seeing a ghost. I can’t believe she’s here and she’s alive. Part of me thought she might be dead.

Walking through the deserted streets, I stumble over the cobblestone and nearly tumble to the ground. I know I’ve imbibed quite a bit but I guess I didn’t realize exactly how drunk I’ve gotten. It took me quite a bit of liquid courage to face Harper once more.

Hearing that she has a child now was a devastating blow. In my mind, I could assume she ran away because she was scared or she was threatened by someone. I assumed that she was in hiding for my protection. Now it’s clear that she didn’t run away to protect me, or that she felt scared. She moved on without me and she doesn’t need me.

I fall to my knees on the pavement, weeping as I realize that for a second time, I’ve lost the woman I love. It was hard enough to lose her the first time but now? Knowing that there’s no chance for us? It’s like swallowing a blade.

My throat constricts and I lean over, heaving up bile on the ground. It burns my throat and I feel as though I’m dying all over again. Whatever happened between us is over now. I can’t be around her and she’ll probably never forgive me for what I said to her.

I finish throwing up and sit down on the damp stones, bending my knees and leaning my head between them as I takein air slowly, trying to calm my rolling stomach. I wish I’d never seen her. I wish that she had stayed a distant memory.

Knowing that she’s here makes it so much worse. What am I supposed to do? How do I move on knowing that she’s alive and well?

Tossing my head back, I groan. If only there were easy answers up in the stars.

---