Page 128 of Daughter of the Drowned Empire
“It would require more time. More effort. Starting before the run in the mornings. Staying later. Training on the weekends.” He paused, his eyes intense. “It won’t be easy. You’d have to commit. Spend less time with your family, friends, going to parties, sleeping….”
I bristled. “I can commit. But what about you?”
“I quit partying when I became forsworn, and I never sleep.”
I searched his expression. Though attempting to make a joke, he was making a serious offer, sacrificing his time and energy. For me. But more than that, he was taking a risk. If anyone saw us and suspected our relationship was anything more than novice and apprentice, being expelled from the university or even banished from Bamaria would be a mercy.
A powerful, deep feeling rose up inside me. A desire and yearning. I wanted to say yes because I wanted the training. I was finally ready to give this my all. And I wanted to be around him more often. And that…that was so much more dangerous than whatever the Emperor was preparing for me come winter.
“If you ask me to train you, I’ll say yes.”
I started to open my mouth, but he cut me off.
“I want you to rest today. Think about it. If you commit to this extra training, you have to mean it. I won’t make it easy.”
“I know.”
“And…what I said to you last night…what…almost happened between us. I won’t say it again. And that will never, ever, happen again. Not if we’re going to stay safe.”
A pit formed in my stomach. He hadn’t kissed me because he said I’d consume him if he did. But his lips had brushed against mine. And that had been all I’d needed to feel like I was on fire for him.
“You’re right,” I said.
“Then go take the rest of the day off. Think on it, and tell me your answer tomorrow.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
THEAIRFELTcooloutside as I walked back to my apartment. Fall was finally coming, and I was ready. Ready for a change. Ready to release the past and to build up my strength with Rhyan.
For a rare moment, I felt oddly hopeful, like by some miracle of the Gods I’d have a handle on everything. I felt like possibility was suddenly in my life again, like I’d succeed.
I entered my apartment building and headed down a hall. A soturion stalked the shadows of the hallway, her cloak blending into the dark. This soturion wore a mask over her face, a mask of black feathers—a black seraphim.
Emartis.
She didn’t see me at first. I stalked after her, already aware of who she was. I could always spot soturi—especially when I knew them, and I knew her. I knew the cut of that chin. I knew the characteristic dark, silky hair and golden-brown skin of the members of Ka Elys.
Tani Elwen, Ka Elys. Lady Pavi’s lap dog and the soturion even more determined than Naria to make my life hell and make me pay for what had happened to Pavi.
I was done paying.
“Tani!” I said without thinking. Deep brown eyes glared at me through slits in the feathered mask. “It was you—you left that note, you broke into my apartment. I’m going to report you.”
“Report me,” she said with a laugh, stepping out of the shadows, pulling the mask off her face, and tossing it in her bag. “I’ll report you,” she snapped.
“Report me for what?” I asked.
“For using kashonim to cheat during the habibellum.” She held up her hand to silence my protests. “You think I don’t know what it looks like when it’s being used, when someone weak, powerless, and pathetic suddenly has strength to spare? I’ve been watching you. I know what you’re like in a fight—last month I fought you myself. No way could you have fought back or survived the way you did without taking all Rhyan had to give.”
I glared even as my heart pounded. I couldn’t reveal emotion, couldn’t show I was upset by her truth.
A gryphon does not shed tears when it’s called a seraphim. It knows what it is. Only a seraphim in the mask of a gryphon would be upset—for their truth has been revealed. Never show offense, or you reveal your truth to your enemies. Control what they see, and you control what they think.
Aunt Arianna’s lesson was still fresh in my mind. I could use it and my own ability to play my role perfectly.
I stalked forward. “Even if you did say something, you have no proof. But I do…I’ve seen you and your mask.”
“He was very concerned about you,” Tani said, batting her eyelashes. “Very invested. I’m not the first, you know, to suspect there’s something between you.”
