Page 171 of Lady of the Drowned Empire
He twitched against me. “Gods, Lyr. Where did you learn to speak so fucking dirty?”
I bit his bottom lip. “I had a good teacher.”
And with those words, it was like a leash had snapped. His hands and mouth were everywhere, kissing, licking, biting, groaning into my skin. He tilted my hips up, shifting the blankets beneath me, not only creating a cushion against the floor but elevating my hips to meet his, deepening the sensations.
He lowered his head, drawing my nipple into his mouth, flicking the sensitive peak with his tongue.
I bucked beneath him, my skin humming with pleasure as his hand cupped my other breast, his thumb brushing my overly sensitive nipple. His other hand moved down my body, the callouses of his fingers teasing me as he slid them between us, adding pressure I hadn’t known I needed.
I threw my head back, crying out, my fingers digging into his back.
He growled. “Keep making those sounds, partner, and this is going to be over very quickly.” He shifted his mouth to my other breast, as he, at last, pushed a finger inside me.
I gasped, immediately clamping down around him. “I want to touch you.”
“Partner,” he breathed against my skin. “I want that, too. But I’m not sure I have the control right now. Let me touch you first.” He added a second finger, slowly fucking them in and out of me.
In that moment, I seemed to realize that this was really happening. We were finally at this moment after all the years, all the oaths sworn, all the promises made, all the attempts to fulfill duty and honor. Finally, we’d arrived at the place that felt as if it had always been inevitable, always fated. Like we were somehow always this—always together, always this natural.
He was moving his mouth lower and lower, kissing his way down my breasts and my stomach, his tongue brushing against my belly button. His eyes rose up to meet mine, dancing with a fiery emerald light as he continued his descent.
I arched up, and suddenly, a wave of shyness fell over me as I realized where his mouth was going next. I hadn’t expected…hadn’t been prepared. I reached for his head, my fingers tangling in his curls.
“Rhyan, wait,” I said breathlessly. “Are you….?” I couldn’t get the words out, too full of desire, even amidst the vulnerability.
“Am I what?” His eyes filled with mischief, a hungry smile on his face. “You know what I’m going to do, partner. You know I want to drink my fill of you. And I’m about to savor every last drop.”
My stomach tightened, as his hands gripped my ass.
“It’s just….” I stared up at the ceiling, watching the reflection of water and fire shine in the stones above us. “I’ve never done…that…before.”
Rhyan stilled before climbing back up, resting his chin on my belly, stroking my skin with his thumb.
I looked down and caught the surprised look on his face.
“Your choice?” he asked carefully.
I could hear the implication. If I hadn’t done this before, it was because a certain someone—that I was positive neither of us wanted to name in this moment—hadn’t done this for me. In truth, he’d been willing. I’d been the one who’d refused, always hiding my body, always trying to keep him satisfied while keeping him from seeing my scars, my wounds, and the truth of who I was, the secrets I was forced to keep. And maybe…maybe some part of me had also been insecure—worried he wouldn’t think I was perfect. I’d never been perfect enough. Not for him. Not for myself. Not for anyone.
I could feel that old habit rearing its head. That old fear. The sudden panic, the need to hide, to protect. For too many years, my body hadn’t been my own. Too many had tried to possess it, use it for their various needs.
But Rhyan had helped me feel like I could reclaim it. Like I could be in control. Even if the attack earlier this week had set me back.
I nodded. “It was my choice. At the time it…felt too vulnerable. And I was too nervous to be seen…like that.”
Kissing my stomach, he said, “That makes sense.” He pushed up onto his elbows, sliding farther up my body until his head was over mine. He kissed my lips again. “We don’t have to, if you don’t want. But you have nothing to be worried about with me. I swear.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, taking a deep breath. “I want to. It’s just…I think I just needed a second.”
He smiled softly. “Take all the seconds you want.”
“Maybe I should also tell you that this,” I gestured between us, “is my first time.”
Rhyan was too slow to hide the second look of surprise on his face.
“Is that okay?” I asked, unsure of his reaction.
His face softened. “Of course, it’s okay.” His voice was so gentle, so reassuring. “I just didn’t know. But I’m glad I do now.” He brushed my hair behind my ear, tracing the curve of it with such tenderness I shivered. “I’ll be gentle,” he said. “You don’t need to feel nervous. You know you’re safe with me, right? And that you’re always, always in control?”
